"What is the lesson in being miserable?"
Dear Ayal: Can you please help me?
I am struggling with a long term chronic disesase and now it is affecting my finances. What is the lesson in being miserable? And what is the cause or causes for this misery? AND HOW CAN I come out of it?
The first thing that showed up for you was the possibility of heavy metal toxicity. I invite you to go see a medical doctor and get tested for this - they can test for heavy metals via your urine. If you do show positive for heavy metal toxicity, there is a product called 'metal free' which works long term, very well.
Secondly, chances are if you have a long standing, chronic condition, you can count on that you have long standing negative beliefs that have created it - whatever you think or believe, if these beliefs are distorted or not in alignment with your highest truth, so will your body mirror these distortions - this will translate into the physical and show up as some form of illness.
The issues that are showing up for you are bitterness, disappointment, competition, self doubt, and self pity. What this tells me is that you have doubted yourself, believing that you are not good enough as you are - and so now your body reflects this too and is not good enough - i.e., ill. I think that you may have incarnated with these beliefs - so, you've had them a long time.
Since thinking that you are not good enough goes against the natural laws of the universe, which state that you are God, and therefore good enough exactly, perfectly as you are - then, you are, in a sense, going against yourself and your Truth, and this kind of warfare within yourself can only make you sick. Now, you can stay miserable, holding onto these old beliefs, or you can face what you have believed - and face what you find yourself believing IN EVERY MOMENT - and use each moment as an opportunity to see what you are believing - and then change it to something better, if you choose to. Each moment holds all the energy and power and glory and abundant health of the universe - it's all right there, ready and available to be harnessed by what you choose to believe in and create in that moment. You can choose to fill your being with love and health in that moment, or you can continue to choose to think you are not good enough and continue to create that. That's the point of all of this - the point that you have brought yourself to - to be able to now choose what it is you want to create in any given moment.
Since you have believed this for a long time, it will take time to un-do the damage - but it can be done. It will take awareness of what you are thinking and believing, and the commitment to change it and to be steadfast in new beliefs. You will be challenged with this and re-challenged, every moment, in fact. But, it can be done. And your soul will gain incredible inner strength. Or, you can stay in victim consciousness and allow things to remain as they are. It's totally up to you.