"I find it hard to let go of old and dysfunctional beliefs"
Hello... first of all, I really enjoy this site, I have found many answers to many inner questions...
But my other question involves releasing beliefs that do not work anymore. For example, I am a writer at heart, but believe that I will never make any money doing it, so I never attempt to live out my desire. I know I should treat my body better, but do not think it will do any good, so I do not. I recognize these patterns, but am having a hard time putting healing into effect. I am reading Sandra Ingerman's Medicine for the Earth right now, and am fascinated by the idea of letting the old self die. But how can I let the old self die, when I'm not sure how to prepare for that death? Or when I'm not ready? Though I know it is the step I need to take.
Hi - glad to hear that you enjoy the site. I'm also glad that you have found it useful for answering questions you have had.
To speak to your first issue - you believe you can't make money writing. This is an issue of not giving yourself enough emotional support. You're not backing yourself up, in other words. So, the question is, what stops you from loving yourself?
Once again, we find that the issue is self hatred. It's as if you are saying : "I hate the blood in my body!" When we look at it that way, it seems sort of silly. The blood in our body is a God given thing - we don't have to do anything to deserve it - it's just there, freely and lovingly given to us, full, and rich, and vital, and giving us all the energy we need to live. So, why would we hate it? When you hate any part of yourself, you are buying into the mass consciousness belief in evil and believing therefore, that you don't deserve these gifts - and so you must reject them. So, you adopt a belief that says "Oh, I can't make money writing". Well, writing = creative energy, and God = creative energy, and money = abundance, and God = abundance, so it's as if you are saying you can't have God....believing that you are bad. How can this be, when all is God? When you already have it! You ARE it. You can deny that you are God by holding onto certain beliefs that limit your energy, but, the fact is, you are God anyway. It's just a question of when you decide to accept that. When there is enough energy and power behind something, it succeeds. It doesn't matter what it is. If writing is your God given gift - your own special creative energy, like your blood, how could it not support you?
First, to get through this belief in self hatred, you have to be willing to detach from mass consciousness and what it believes. Such as, "writers don't make enough money to support themselves." Are you willing to put out a committed and strong intention to do that? To fly on your own power ... and live from a clearer Truth? If so, put it out there! Make that intention, loud and clear. In order to break free of mass consciousness, like breaking free of a gravitational pull, you've got to up your own level of energy. Right now, your energy level is low - you're not giving your vehicle enough gas, in other words, to get you anywhere. Are you just giving in and saying "Oh, well. Ho hum. This is how it is?" Well, low grade, mass consciousness, limiting beliefs don't power the car. Now... you have a right to use low octane gas if you choose, and you can stay stuck in a place that obviously doesn't feel so good to you, or, you can up your level of energy. This will involve inner work and a commitment to it. Which in the end, is a full commitment to yourself. So, once again - are you willing to love yourself? That's the only real gas there is.
There are some things that will help you up your energy level, if that is what you choose to do. The first is taking some time for seclusion. Being totally alone in a healing place that feels good to you - going to an ashram somewhere, or even camping out in the woods. Using this time for prayer, contemplation, meditation. Three days in a row every month is good for you. The second is to get the turquoise aurasoma products - both the pomander and quintessence essences. The turquoise pomander is for creative communication of the heart, and the turquoise quintessence is the Greater Teacher which will encourage the positive qualities and help in the release of feelings that need to be expressed. You can order these by e-mailing firstname.lastname@example.org. You also need to clear out your second chakra, which deals with the quantity of emotional and sexual energy you have. You want to work on it where it connects to the body, in the back, on a level with the sexual organs. You can do this by asking for it to be restored to perfect health and functioning, and to visualize and fill that area with, 3 times a day, a beautiful orange light.
Now, to move on to the second issue you mentioned - that taking care of yourself won't do any good. This is a pretty heavy duty statement that you sort of just threw in there. Wow. I hear you saying "What good am I anyway?" What does it matter if I live? Isn't this about self love too? Where does this belief come from? How could taking care of yourself NOT do any good?? Of course it will. It will give you energy and love - ( do you deserve that?) - and with the energy of Love - which is God - which is the energy that creates and powers THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE, how could that NOT do any good? This is an issue of "I'm not worth it" and it seems to be coming from your inner child which got blown out somewhere, sometime, from feeling it couldn't compete - you ended up with a belief that said you couldn't measure up to something, or someone. So you were the expendable one. The one who was not good enough or even worth living. What's that all about? That's where you lost your energy. So every time you go to do something to prove you are worth it, like writing or taking care of yourself, this belief kicks in and stops you. Bang! Well, I would say this issue very much needs to be tracked, looked at, and worked through in meditation. It's your key.
As far as letting the old self die - well, we all carry a societal charge on the word "die" - so it would probably work better to use a different image. What we are actually doing is allowing the old to be reborn - we're simply recycling, in other words - allowing something that we've used to flow and grow and transmute into new energy. That's all it is. We are never wrong - every strategy or belief we have created has been formed to serve us and try to help us in some way. As we grow and mature and get more information, we can allow these old forms to change - just like we graduate and move on to other grade levels in school. We're not dying - just growing and going on to the next level where we can do more.
So... what if you sincerely thanked your old self and your old beliefs for doing the best job they knew how to do at the time? And during a time of quiet meditation or looking within, you can ask to be in touch with that part of yourself that holds an old belief which you are choosing to change. You thank it, and then you ask that part of you that holds that certain belief if it is willing to do it's job better. If it answers yes, and it will, as all is Love... then you give it its new job description, what you want in your life NOW that really works for you. So, it's not DYING - it's just moving on to a new job opportunity, where it can help you even better. Then you thank it again, feeling and allowing the energy to move and shift. Caterpillars DO change into butterflies, you know, and all things DO shift into new forms of energy, constantly. Even our own cells are totally regrown - I think it's every 7 days or so. So, it's a natural part of life that energy changes constantly. Think of it that way. You've been afraid to let the old self change because you wanted and needed to know that it was good enough as it was, first, before you could let it go. Well, it was.
Many blessings. Wishing you the best. You're worth it! Ayal