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"I am overly sensitive as soon as another woman shows dislike or disapproval for me."

Here is my question:

I've been dealing with an immature situation which has brought feelings from my past as a child. I consider myself a spiritual person and always try to find the reason why things happen to me. I've been a reader of your website for a long time and been open to looking at ways to resolve feelings/beliefs from my past

My ex-boyfriend's current partner does not like me at all. They began their relationship about 3 months after we broke up. My ex-boyfriend and I had a short and intense relationship but over the last month or so of the relationship, he became very distant, almost angry, with me. I couldn't understand why. When my nephew and co-worker died 2-3 weeks from each other and my mother had emergency health problems, I needed him for comfort and support... but he wasn't there. I tried to talk to him one night but he became angry and left the room. I knew then that he didn't want me anymore and that I should leave. The next day I packed up my stuff and left. I wanted so much for things to work out but it didn't happen. When I found out that he was in a new relationship, it was devastating. Over time I became involved with someone who is way more loving, supporting, and drama-free then my ex was. We now have a beautiful little girl and have a good life. There is no way I can ever consider going back to that situation.

However, something is troubling me. The current partner of my ex-boyfriend has made it obvious that she doesn't like me one bit. Just recently, I found out that she made some mean comments about me online. I've been feeling attacked and hurt and I don't understand why I am allowing her to affect me so much. I can compare my feelings to how I felt growing up... other women are better than me, I am inferior, I don't matter. It is like as soon as another woman shows dislike, disapproval for me... I have to "submit". Rationally, I know her attitude and behaviour shows immaturity and insecurity and I've tried to forgive her in my head but it is not working.

I'm hoping that you can help me understand or see the situation differently so my heart and mind can connect. I need some insight on what is happening underneath so I can work on clearing the negative thoughts/beliefs. I look forward to hearing from you.

Hi – what I am getting for you is that when you were growing up, your relationship with a sibling had you disliking yourself. You did not accept yourself. You may have felt helpless around this person, and that pattern is still in there active and operating. So, when you are with another woman who triggers that issue and pattern of disliking yourself, those old hurts and wounds come up. And remember, your not accepting yourself comes from within your own mind, no matter what anyone else says or does. They are just a mirror for that belief you carry within yourself. It's only thought forms, a pattern or wavelength of energy vibrations that can be changed as you choose.

To change this, I invite you to work with the Whole Heart Healing technique found at www.peakstates.com. I'd do it twice within a 2 week period. Read it over and when you feel familiar with it, go for it. Allow yourself to go as deep as you can, really surrendering to the process.

When you have finished, each time, re-fill yourself with, feeling it completely in every cell and bringing it in with every breath, the energy of:

I am a Divine expression of Life. I love and accept myself where I am right now, in each and every moment. I am grateful for the beautiful and powerful being that I AM.

That's it for now. All I've been told that you need at the moment. Glad you enjoy the site!

Blessings, Ayal


527. "My husband has turned against my family... so many times he laughed at my love for my mum."

Click here to donate & send a question to Ayal:

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