"I have been working on this for a long time but still haven't managed to attract supportive, loving people into my life."
In the past I have attracted many, many abusive relationships. I feel as though I am breaking this pattern now but still haven't managed to attract supportive, loving people into my life. I think my blocks are around self acceptance and self love - I have been working on this for a long time and have made progress. I guess I would just like some feedback about what ideas/thoughts/beliefs/ might be hurting me and if there is anything I haven't addressed from the unconscious. Thank you Peace.
OK – let's dive in. What is showing up for you is the issue of feeling "Hopeless". A lot of people have this, but are not even remotely aware that they do. It's an energy issue that gets buried very very deeply, usually very early on, and then gets reinforced over and over again, and people just live with it being that way, not knowing anything else, and the life they create from having it, as if that's just how life is. When, usually as children, but it can come later, as well, we experience something where we felt defeated in some way, or helpless, or powerless – when we experience a trauma of some sort, or are experiencing something we feel trapped in, and can't seem to get out of it, or away from it – whether it's an angry, frustrated mother who herself feels helpless and impotent, and takes it out by yelling, or an absentee father who can't give you the love you need, or whether it's an even more intense situation, such as a drunken, physically abusive parent, etc – we deflate, collapse somewhere deep inside, and we establish an energy and belief in hopelessness. We lose our power and our trust in a kind, loving, supportive Universe. We stop trusting that Life itself will support us. When we live from this place, we are outside of the natural flow of Life, and things just can't work out.
When this happens, different people respond in different ways. Some get angry and abusive also. Some retreat and get timid, or create a fantasy world that is safe and more enjoyable then being part of the real one.
What also happens, when we don't believe that we are worth being supported and loved and taken care of, we don't know how to do it, or know that we even CAN do it, for ourselves. We keep on waiting for someone else to finally take care of us – so we look for that seemingly 'strong other" - usually a dominating type of person who wants to control someone else – to do it for us. This never works, and just creates another hopeless, feeling trapped and dis-empowered situation. It continues to reinforce the hopeless belief that is causing one to choose such a partner.
However, whatever your MO turns out to be, the abuse you experienced, in whatever form, or the lack of love, or feeling dis-empowered and unsafe, it has to be explored and released from the tissues. The deep, unseen place where the hopelessness lives has got to be excavated and unveiled, seen for what it is, how it feels to be living with it in your body... and then, once it's brought into the light of consciousness, you begin to vibrate on a different frequency. You open to the sun, like a flower... you start trusting life, and deep in the deepest part of you, in ALL parts of you, you feel alive, strong – AND you KNOW that as you love Life, Life loves you back. You know that you DESERVE all the best – you DESERVE to be supported and loved in a healthy way, and you CREATE being loved and supported in an honoring, equally healthy way, where BOTH people are empowered, because you attract WHAT YOU ARE ALREADY. Your vibration attracts to it a like vibration.
So, if you EXPECT not to be supported or loved, and you come from fear and hopelessness, you will attract abuse and lack of support.
So, I invite you to check out how and what your relationships felt like – especially with your father – find the way you felt around him, tune into your body reactions, and emotional responses, or anyone else who seems relevant to this issue – then, I invite you to look up online the info on Whole Heart Healing, on www.peakstates.com. Read it over, then take yourself through the simple technique when you have time to be quiet and alone and feel safe... I'd invite you to go through this technique once a week for 2 weeks, and then use as needed.
An aurasoma product will also support you as you uncover this old stuff....you can look aurasoma up online as well. One company I order from is in Texas, and the phone # is 1-866-298-6099. The one you need to order is called Rono Simaron – it's a butterfly essence for grounding and centering and connecting you to others in a healthy way, encouraging well being and harmony. It's used as an essential oil, so when you order it, ask them where to apply it for best results. I'd use it 3 times a day until it's all gone.
P.S. The mantra for you is something like this:
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