"I suffer from anxiety and panic attacks - is there a way for me to create a calm life?"
Just found your website and love your answers. I've been suffering from anxiety and panic-type attacks for many years now. I'd like to stop this. It seems to have gotten worse during my previous and current marriage - is there a way for me to be better in my current marriage and create a calm life?
Hi - Well, the first and possibly most important part of any healing is your willingness, readiness, openness and availability to access and to clear all imbalances. If you truly are committed to that, then you can transform what you are seeking to transform. Right now, even though you have written in asking for guidance on this issue, you are only at about 20% willingness to face what it is you need to look at. So, let's look at that first.
Well, what I am getting is that there is a lot of stress you are in, as you said, but much of this is due to a virus, or toxins in your body. Are you aware of this? It would be important for you to go to a good naturopathic doctor in your area and get tested for what's going on. If the physical body is stressed, the rest of you will not be able to function well either. You will not be in balance or have the energy or clarity you need to be emotionally balanced. Have the naturopath check into the sacral and spleen areas especially.
There is an issue of embarrassment showing up for you. You seem to have an "I'm always a square peg in a round hole" type of thing going on. If you believe yourself to be the oddball, then that is what you will create for yourself coming back to you in life's relationships and experiences. We are all unique - yet, we are all also deeply connected and making the same basic journey in this life: toward love, wholeness, enlightenment, peace, healing. When you can love yourself, you will also then be able to see others with love - to see the common bonds that unite us all. If you keep yourself separate and outside of things and see yourself as odd and isolated, or shameful somehow, then how can you connect well with another in relationship? As a spark of the divine, what is there to be embarrassed about yourself? Would a flower be embarrassed about itself, or a snowflake? It's time to look at the perfection that you are - a being who is making an ongoing wonderful journey of refinement and discovery - but who is perfect at whatever place along the journey you are at and find yourself. It would be good for you to be able to see what created this sense of embarrassment for you and to heal it. You can use the formula for changing core beliefs found in The Laws of the Universe on this site to help you with that.
Somewhere along the way, you felt destroyed by something. What is that about? Look into issues of feeling that you were rejected by your family. If you have this belief going on, then in all likelihood, you will attract people in relationship who will also reject you in some way. That is not a healthy situation to create for yourself, and will cause you an immense amount of stress and lack of health in all areas. But - the key here is for YOU NOT TO REJECT YOURSELF!! It would be good to say this, twice a day for 3 weeks, and then to allow information to come to you as it will:
Also: "I am open to receiving guidance about why I hold onto this relationship."
Your water element is off in your body, and water deals with relationship, with flow, with peace of mind. You need to drink more water and tune into the energy of water. Sit by a river or lake or ocean at least twice a week if possible, and just let its energy flow into you. I invite you to drink at least eight 10 ounce glasses of water a day from now on. Very important to not only keep energy flowing and releasing, but it also flushes toxins out of the body. This will give you more energy.
You are needing to get to a state beyond the influences of the personal, or egoistic mind - to do this, it would be good for you to sit in meditation twice a day for 20 minutes and chant. If you don't know any spiritual chants, you can get a CD or tape of some and sing along. This is very healing, soothing, and will create a better state of clarity and harmony within you. Rise above the breath, tune yourself into the cosmic Vibration and with great feelings of love and devotion toward all that is, the Creator, focus intently at the point between the eyebrows in the center of the forehead and mentally appeal to the Creator in this way:
Here is some important information for you to read about depression:
All depression arises from feelings of disempowerment. (As well as toxic memories, unresolved or unfaced fears.) The balance of power in your life shifts, and you no longer feel that you are calling the shots. Clinical depression: usually arises from external or physical events. It may have its roots in a chemical imbalance or a traumatic life change - anything from a divorce or the loss of a loved one or a serious illness. Such depression often results in an inability to function effectively and needs to be treated by an appropriate mental health practitioner. Spiritual depression: most likely triggered by an absorption in metaphysical issues than by physical concerns. You may feel that you've reached a dead end or been abandoned by God, or have no hope of ever experiencing Divine union. Spiritual crises can sometimes be caused by a traumatic change such as a serious illness or a divorce - IF it leads you to question the meaning and value of your life rather than focus entirely on your material misfortune.
If you react by asking yourself how you will ever find someone to replace your lost loved one, how you can get out of a job that's killing you, or how you can find enough money to live, more than likely your depression is primarily psychological. If you respond specifically to the feeling of having been rendered powerless by being consumed with anger, or blame directed toward others, you are most likely NOT spiritually depressed. If however, you are asking yourself questions about the meaning of life or about why God seems so distant from you, then most likely you're in a spiritual crisis, and you may need to seek out a spiritual counselor rather then a psychotherapist.
If you determine that your depression is largely spiritual, one solution may be to surrender all your worldly fears and concerns to the Divine: "Let go and Let God". You can make a simple declaration to the Divine that your own attempts to direct your spiritual life have come up empty, and that you need Divine assistance. Surrendering to Divine guidance is different from giving up all your worldly goods as you would do if you were to take the traditional vow of poverty. Yet realizing that you live under the protective field of a Sacred Contract, which provides you with all that your life requires for the evolution of your spirit, can allow you to end the struggle between your own will and that of the Divine. The act of surrendering is a statement that says: "I allow the Divine to make my investment according to a wisdom greater than my own." The polarity between our rational and intuitive selves - to sense energy and repress it for lack of rational support - creates an inner atmosphere that sets the stage for suffering and depression.
That's enough for now.