Trans4mind Home Page
Clearing the Way

"I'm jealous of my fiance's female friend and fear he will prefer her"

I've been with my fiance for over 3 years and everything was PERFECT until his father was killed in a motorcycle accident about 6 months ago. When he was going through the grieving process he was very angry and took it out on me. (He ignored me for about 2 months). Now everything is pretty much back to normal. (He treats me like a queen!) EXCEPT now I'm extremely jealous of his best friend. She's an attractive woman with a great personality. (She's been a wonderful friend to me too.) Deep down I know there's nothing more than friendship between them. They were friends way before I met him and I never had a problem before the death. NOW I obsess about her. I think that they're going to realize they should be togther. I hate that I feel this way because I know that it's all in my head. I CANT STOP IT!!!! I just want to feel the way I used to before the death. Why did this all the sudden come on and how can I make it stop? PLEASE HELP... I don't want to lose my fiance (the! BEST thing thats happened to me!!) or the friendship I have with his best friend. HEEEELLLLLPPPP!!! Thank you so much.

Hi - Well, what I am getting, interestingly enough, is that you took on some energy that isn't yours when his father died. It's an energy of insecurity and fear. If your guy was in this energy, and as you said, he took it out on you, I think what happened was that you absorbed it.

A couple of things you can do:

  1. Say the following twice:

    "Mother -Father God and Holy Spirit: Assist me by directing any energy I took on that is not mine but is in my field to the God consciousness. Replace that energy with God's perfect love energy. Thank you!"

  2. Also, you can do the following:

    Visualize a beautiful, glowing white light above your head. Then slowly bring it down through your whole body, through your feet, and then send it into the earth. Then surround yourself with a cocoon of glowing white light. State the intention very firmly that only the highest love vibration can or is allowed to enter your field.

    I'd do this 3 times within a 3 hour period.

There are issues here for you of thinking you do not have your own power, of living from a place of not having your own power. Otherwise, this could not have happened. You have to, in some way, have agreed to let an inappropriate or outside energy invade your space. Otherwise it could not do so. If you believe you do not have your own power or do not take total responsibility for what you create in your life, you will vacate your position of power within yourself, like vacating the driver's seat of your car, and then you will allow another to take that over. No one else can drive your car (your life) but you. To think another can make you happy or unhappy is to vacate the driver's seat. YOU make yourself happy or unhappy. If you think your happiness comes from outside of yourself, then you allow the energy of others to enter your field in an inappropriate way. The best thing that ever happened to you, by the way, is not him, or anything else outside of yourself. The best thing that ever happened to you is YOU - yourself and your own soul essence. If you believe otherwise, you will be like a leaf in the wind, blowing this way and that depending upon whatever wind (people's energy) is blowing near you in your space. And you see the results now of doing that. You have to have your own strong roots, and those you grow yourself. No one else can make you feel anything. YOU chose what you want to feel from inside of yourself. If you chose to love, then you will. YOU are the one choosing to love this guy and that is what creates such deep happiness for you - your own choice to love. I invite you strongly to read the Laws of the Universe found on this site, many times, until you get a real sense of what this is all about.

If you find that this energy and sense of insecurity persists, go on the net and look up the Foundation for Shamanic Studies, and find a practitioner near you. Tell them you need to have an extraction done.

But regardless, this lesson has come to show you how much you need to own your own power and understand that YOU create your own reality and what happens in your life.

Blessings, Ayal

398. "My self-worth is wrapped up in what I do, rather than in who I am"


Click here to donate & send a question to Ayal:
Clearing the Way   |   Laws of the Universe   |   Recommended Links

Looking for personal healing?

Trans4mind Training is our series of online, interactive video workshops. We present the most effective methods of holistic personal development, combined with support from expert life coaches.
Making your heartfelt dreams come true.