"I've programmed some negative ideas into my mind and can't get rid of them"
I was subjected to a very strong emotional experience at work where I have unfortunately written some negative beliefs into my subconscious mind. I was also upset with my wife at the time and have written beliefs that I want to cheat on her into my subconscious mind. Now every time I see a beautiful girl on the street I get "spooked" because my subconscious mind wants to pursue the issue but my conscious doesn't. I made a bad decision at the time and now my mind is "programmed" in this negative belief. If I consciously agree with the negative believe, (by repeating the negative belief) I'm given some freedom from my pain instantly... should I continue to agree with this belief, but consciously knowing that I'm not going to do anything???
I'm not sure how to release all of the physical pain I've been experiencing with this programming "anxiety, stress, chest, lump in the throat, etc." Also how do I identify what other negative programming is lurking in my subconscious mind?
My relationship has been suffering lately, and I'm really happy being at home now but my subconscious mind is still incorrectly programmed. My wife is getting very upset with me lately, and I want to get my life back in order. I started to take anti-depressants, but I don't think that is the answer....
Please read the Laws of the Universe found on this site. In it, there is information about releasing and reprogramming a core belief. The main thing to do to change any belief you have is insert the new thought form along with a strong, new emotion. Both are needed for a new manifestation to occur. So, for instance, when you insert the program "I am happily, monogamously in love with my wife and fully satisfied in our relationship", or, "I can now appreciate the beauty of all beings without feeling any need to act upon it", etc., you then feel that emotion with all of your being, how good that feels. Then you can tap your forehead 3 times to put it in place. When you have a negative belief come up, you can snap your fingers of both hands 3 times to break it. Also however, you need to love yourself and give yourself understanding and empathy for whatever decisions you made. That doesn't mean you go along with the belief, but that you give yourself kindness, which stops the fear and the anxiety. Then, you make a clear decision to gently and lovingly put in a new program.
It sounds to me that you are learning about loving yourself, and being kind to yourself as you learn along your journey. There's no need to ever beat yourself up or make yourself "wrong". That isn't love. We learn as we go. As long as you are willing to continue learning and growing into more harmony and clarity, as long as you are willing to do the inner work you need to do to gain that harmony and clarity, and you are choosing not to cause harm to yourself or to others, then you are on the right track. When you can give that love and compassion to yourself, and then calmly take the next step to get back on track, you will also be able to give that love and kindness and compassion to others. And that's what makes any relationship great.