"My career is not taking off and I suspect it's due to the way that I think"
I'd really like your advice on something which may sound a bit superficial. It's quite difficult to articulate without rambling on in a completely unstructured way but will try anyway... I guess a lot of it concerns my career. I live in a major city and work in a very competitive creative industry. I quit my job last year to go work freelance which has been a bit uneven. the main reason i quit was to pursue a line of work that was more personal to me - so far that hasn't really happened. I would love to work for a company/product that I really admire. Most of the commissions i get now are for a very commercial company that I don't really believe in. on the one hand i know i should be grateful for regular work at all but the other part is a bit more demanding and asks if other people can get the exciting jobs why cant I?! The other side to all of this is money etc. I would dearly love to own my own home which is very difficult here unless you earn a fortune. I'm even beginning to wonder if im doing the right thing at all. As much as i like the freedom of a big city, I find it very competitive and claustrophobic and it would be great to live a more outdoors kind of life.
My mum says she doesn't think i'm cut out for the work i do (she thinks Im too sensitive) and if at 31, i still haven't found the great success i initially craved, perhaps it just wont come at all. I didn't think I thought I would have achieved this little at my age but deep down I suspect its to do with the way I think - although I dont know how to REALLY change that. I suspect that somewhere along that line i feel like i dont really deserve it which is frustrating because i do think i have a kind of talent too, if that doesnt sound too pompous. there really is so much i want to do but I seem to constantly crave other peoples acceptance and approval first which is nigh on impossible as i do my work in a very quiet way, or maybe I'm just not that good! sorry if this is a bit long - have tried to make it as concise as i can!
Hi - these fears and insecurities are stemming from your inner child place. It will be good for you to confront these fears by doing some meditations where you ask to speak to your inner child and ask her what she needs from you in order to feel more secure and worthwhile. Just sit quietly in meditation and visualize yourself as a little girl - go sit down beside her and have a conversation. Ask her when are where these beliefs began that she wasn't good enough, and allow whatever emotion comes up in you to be fully expressed and released. Connecting in this way to your inner child often would be a good thing to do. When you understand where the origins of these beliefs and fears come from, and you have flowed the emotions behind them, then use the formula for changing core beliefs found in the Laws of the Universe on the site.
A good affirmation to say along with this is :
We are born to manifest the glory of God that is within us. When we truly feel that, and accept it, and believe it, then everything flows harmoniously from there.
Another good question to ask yourself is this: "What are you really protecting by not being willing to be out there being the best you can be?" What's that fear about?