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"Is it possible to have a committed relationship with someone who is not in your same line of work/philosophy?"

Dear Ayal,

You have a great website. I wanted to ask you if it is possible to have a committed relationship with someone who is not in your same line of work/philosophy? I am a nurse but do have a great interest in the metaphysical aspects and beliefs. My boyfriend is a wonderful patient man but I have trouble telling him all of my beliefs, so I am slowly telling him. Can two people who love each other but have different beliefs have a successful marriage or union? Thanks for your answer to this question. Blessings.

Hi - yes, people of different paths or beliefs come together to deeply learn from one another. The outer path isn't really what's going on - it's that two people are coming together to mirror one another, to help one another heal and grow and transform by seeing their issues, as well as good qualities, in the other.

You say that you have difficulty sharing your beliefs with him. That is the place for you to start with your own process. What creates you having difficulty sharing what you love and believe? What do you think will happen if you do? Both parties have something to gain by being with the other. If you are able to slowly share with him (and him with you!) what you believe, and you find that he is receptive, and you then find both of you moving lovingly toward a place that blends who both of you are in a good way, then that is a relationship that works.

The important thing about sharing beliefs and ideas with another is that it is done appropriately - that is to say, you know when the moment is a good one to share something, when there is openness, interest, and trust happening between you. You share it from a place of being excited and interested about it yourself - from a place of just wanting to share - not from a place of imposing your beliefs on another or wanting to convert someone. If you are coming from a place of wanting to change or convert someone to your way of thinking, that is an issue of non-acceptance on your part. It is also a need to be in control. If you love this man for who he is already, then sharing with him ought to be easy because there is no need to change him going on. If there is no need to change him going on, he would not feel any non-acceptance coming at him from you, and therefore he would offer no resistance to hearing what you are passionate about in life. Then that's a clean, honest, feels good communication with no agendas or ulterior motives or hidden issues going on.

If he loves you for who you are, also, then he would be interested in what you have to offer. If, however, there is any energy coming from you of pushing something at him, or a "need' to have him accept your ideas, then there is an issue within you regarding acceptance and being received that I would invite you to explore - to find out what that need is on your part. No one likes to have ideas pushed at them - there are a lot of unclean undercurrents then going on of "I know better than you" or "my way is better" or "I need you to validate and accept me" - which again are issues of non acceptance. Usually this means a non acceptance, somewhere, of oneself. If you accept yourself fully, then what is mirrored back to you from the universe is that others accept you and want to hear what you have to share

You CAN be easily and lovingly received if you believe that you can be and will be - often, of course, we draw someone to us to mirror these issues for ourselves. These issues come up in a relationship, because they are there already within us to get worked out.

Blessings, Ayal

257. "I felt connected and very high but now I face questions about what to do in life"


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