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"How can I get my husband to stop grinding his teeth?"

Dear Ayal,

My husband grinds his teeth terribly while he is asleep. Every time he moves he starts grinding away at his teeth. It is becoming a terrible problem because it is very loud and wakes me. What could be causing him to do this and how can I get him to stop?

Hi - well, the first thing that jumps out at me in your question is that you say "How can I get him to stop?" You can't "get him to stop", as you can't create in his reality. It isn't your job to get anyone to do anything - they must become aware themselves at their own speed and then decide to change something - if they themselves choose to. What you CAN do is lovingly take care of yourself by gently speaking YOUR truth to him, as YOUR reality is all that you are here to deal with.

So, as his teeth grinding bothers you, what you can do is just kindly speak your truth and let him know that you are having difficulty coping with it, and you are wondering how to solve this difficulty for yourself. Then you could ask if he has any ideas, as you are not sure what's the best way to deal with it. If he says no, he doesn't have any ideas, you could also lovingly tell him that you believe, if you do, that there is some issue going on behind any physical symptom that shows up in life, and you are wondering if he is interested in finding out about what that may be for him - if he would be willing to check into what it's about. But then you have to let it be ok if he chooses to say no to that. That's his choice, and whatever he chooses, you can still make other choices that work for you. But, you can ask. Just don't depend on what he chooses or doesn't choose to make it better for you. That's being dependent on him to make your reality better, which limits your own power to create life as you choose for it to be for yourself. Do you get that?

If you are really being a good Creator of your own reality, and taking full responsibility for all that is in your life, you will create having a husband who is willing to deal with issues that show up, if that is something you choose to have in your life. If you have a partner who is unwilling to do that, then that is an area for you to play around with in yourself and see what in YOU is creating having a partner who is unwilling to listen to you or work through things with you. That would be YOUR issue, though, for you to look at and change if you choose to. What would create that being in your life, if that is the case, from what you yourself believe about life, or yourself, or how you expect to be treated?

Practically speaking, in the meantime, however, as you look into what the lesson is here for you, if you choose to do that, and if it feels appropriate to you, if he isn't willing to look into what grinding his teeth is all about, or willing to do something about it, then you make a choice for yourself that takes care of you - for instance, you may decide to wear ear plugs, or sleep elsewhere. That's taking responsibility for yourself.

I could tell you what this issue for him is all about, but that is for him to ask about and find out for himself. Your job here is just to take care of you, in a loving way... to do what you need to do to get a good night's sleep,

Blessings, Ayal

142. "A part of me sabotages my efforts to succeed"


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