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Men and Women COLLIDE!

By Dorothy Lafrinere

Ever been in a situation in your life when your entire world seems to COLLIDE with itself? I am sure we all can raise our hands to that question. There are many ways to COLLIDE in life. Some ways can be sweet and others, downright nasty.

In relationships we tend to COLLIDE, toe to toe more often than we want. We COLLIDE in the way we differ in our thoughts with our partner. We COLLIDE in how we perceive each others reactions. We tend to COLLIDE in our gender views. For that we can that we can thank Mother Nature! We COLLIDE in what we enjoy in the entertainment department, sexual fantasies, favorite restaurants, spending money, vehicles of our choice, and even how we brush our teeth, but to COLLIDE with a loved one is not always a bad thing. It can actually force a certain reality into your relationship. Can you imagine going on through life with a partner and never, ever colliding? (zzzzzzz) Yup, boring! It would be like two mindless, passionless, dependant, robots, maintaining there actions on the same monotone level day after day after day. No HUGGZ, no SMILZ, no LAUGHTER. Ugh and NO SEX! I mean can you imagine two robots having sex. Again I say, "BORING"! We need to COLLIDE to spice things up, to know that we are alive and that our partners are also alive. When we COLLIDE it awakens our deepest passions which we both need to feel, in order to go into a deeper love for one another. I know you are thinking that to COLLIDE only causes war and indifference. You are mostly correct, but how can we know peace with out war? How can we revive or continue to gain in our passions without a true honest COLLIDE between each other? We cannot. When do you have the best sex ever? Think about it. It's almost always after a very loud COLLIDE and it usually starts over something very simple. But oh is the sex GOOD!(MHHHHMM) The simple things that cause us to COLLIDE are hardly ever the real cause of the battle. We tend to put things aside for whatever reason, or we just plain do not want the other person to know that we are human with feelings and that maybe we don't like some of the things that they do or say. We choose to put it on a shelf. I call that shelf, the first step to a major COLLIDE. Some of us stack a whole lot of disappointments and worries on that shelf and others not so many. Some deal with them right off, so that they COLLIDE lightly. For the ones that stack them up, they are the ones that are usually in for a huge COLLIDE. The more weight we carry the heavier the burden, and the more pain we suppress, the harder we strike back, causing us to COLLIDE hard!

We never COLLIDE in that way with people we do not feel love for. We just do not care that much for them. We do COLLIDE with the people closest to us though. It's because we are almost "one being". We know each others weak points and which buttons to push to get them hurting. We also have a very huge investment in our relationship and we do not take anything that threatens it lightly. This is another big reason we COLLIDE. We also learn a lot more about ourselves through each COLLIDE that we experience with our partner. We are not perfect and we are never on top of our mistakes or bad habits. Half of the time we don't even see them until that reality of COLLIDE knocks us down. It's very important to take a fair blame when we COLLIDE though. We are after all, in a partnership and we are in it 50/50. No one person can COLLIDE alone. How often do you stand in the mirror and COLLIDE with yourself? HA! Not too often, I would think. So it does take two to COLLIDE. As the old saying goes,"It takes two to make it and two, to break it."

For the love and passion to grow in our relationship and to continue to grow, we need to COLLIDE sometimes! It's like breathing to live a healthy life. Our feelings of being accepted, strengthen and nurture our self esteem, which allows us to love our partners with a deeper passion. We are also happier and feel almost cleansed and ready to start again after we have passed through a major COLLIDE. Relationships are all about the up's and down's of each persons life. How we deal with them and accept them makes the COLLIDE all that much easier to get through. It is perfectly OK to take a time out after the initial COLLIDE. We tend to need to re-group and let our guard down and let in the new passion that awaits us. Once you feel your feet are back on the ground and you can sense your partner is at the same level, then HUG and HUG and HUG. Then it is make up time and you know what that means. MHM....SEX...SEX...SEX! Now this does not mean that you have to COLLIDE just to have good sex. JEESH not at all! It is just that there are different hormones after a COLLIDE that gets ones blood rushing. Also it really is a good thing to forgive and forget. I know, that is not an easy task. As humans we tend to keep ammunition for our survival. Who likes to eat food that's has already been chewed up?

NOONE! So then imagine bringing up old history as having to re-chew food. I am trying to make it sound that simple. Sometimes when we think simply about things, they are easier to forget. Relationships are very important, so do not forget why you committed to your partner. Remember, they too are investing their life to make a life with you. There is no upper hand in a relationship. It is a partnership of equal love and respect. Both parties have the right to expect those two things. We are human and we do error. It is very important to let each other express our differences and accept them to a point. Through every COLLIDE we grow closer together even when we feel like our world has just turned upside down. TRUE LOVE never dies.

One of the best ways to COLLIDE, is when we COLLIDE skin to skin or toes to toes! That is a positive COLLIDE, that is essential to the survival of a relationship.



"Don`t waste your ammunition shooting at scarecrows"

Toni Sciarra Poynter

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