Trans4mind Home Page
~ A Journey of Self-Discovery ~

Explore Article Library


Never Compare And You'll Always Be Happy

By Bill Lee-Emery

"Never compare and you'll always be happy suggests the old adage. While there is some truth in this statement, we're not likely to take much notice. We're always comparing. No big deal, but how often do we do it in a useful way? Women's magazines are constantly encouraging comparison (with a view to you purchasing something) - usually to an "elite group of models. We often look at the world's "best (and someone who has dedicated their life for a single purpose) and then we compare ourselves less favorably and harshly. Perhaps we have other things to do in our lives too!

What chance does the average person have against such odds? It seems the advertising world has human nature on its side. However there is a way that you can use the art of comparison to your benefit and make life easier.

Consider these scenarios

  1. You're going for a walk and all of a sudden you get caught in a shower without a umbrella.

  2. You lose your wallet with $100 in it.

  3. You were looking forward to a quiet day to yourself and some rowdy friends drop in for the afternoon.

In all those circumstances, you have to deal with it. You're still going to get wet, lose $100 and have your quiet day trampled over by a bunch of rowdies. However the way you "frame it up or package it in your head makes all the difference.

Here's how you can use what is termed "reframing to help you. Since you may not be able to change what is happening, you can at least change your perception, your view or attitude.

Here are some possible reframes.

While you may be caught in a shower, at least when you get home you can dry off and change into something warm. While you are walking, albeit wet, on your way home, you could ponder how it would feel if you were caught in a cyclone instead of just a shower! Boy, you got wet, that's all"you didn't get transported to the neighbouring town! That would have been heaps worse.

So you lost $100 - just as well you haven't gone to the auto teller for another $200 before the theft!

Hey - at least you have friends! Imagine no one ever calling to see you at ALL. That would be lonely!

Am I suggesting you stop feeling your natural reactions? Not at all, just keep in mind where those "natural reactions came from, your perception on "reality". It's all in your head after all!

PS I could be describing the world of the optimist here but guess what a pessimist does? When it's fine weather, they know it will eventually change and become too cold, wet, hot, windy, damp, whatever. They don't get to enjoy the weather even when it's great. How sad is that!?

When they lose the $100 they list all the things they could have bought just 10 minutes before. Now they have even more reason to be miserable.

And as for rowdy friends visiting them, this at least they get spared, after all would you visit this person?

About The Author
Bill Lee-Emery is an Executive and Life Coach. He has been a corporate trainer and facilitator for over 20 years. Bill is author of 'Stop Procrastinating' and 'How to get out of your own way and play better golf!'

You can get his newsletter, 'On Track' by visiting his web site http://www.altitudealliance.com

© by Bill Lee-Emery 2004 email:execoach@bigpond.net.au

execoach@bigpond.net.au


AND EXPLORE...

Addictions
Astrology
Careers & Employment
Communication
Creativity
Dating
Depression
Diabetes
Diets
Divorce
Education
Environment
Ethics
Exercise
Family
Goal-Setting
Grief & Loss
Happiness
Health
Kids & Teens
Leadership
Love
Marriage
Meditation
Nutrition
Organizing
Parenting
Psychology
Public Speaking
Relationships
Schools
Self Help
Self Improvement & Motivation
Sexual Relations
Spirituality
Stress Management
Travel and Leisure
Women
Writing


From our extensive site, you'll find good info on many topics using this search:

Want to renew your life?

Our online, interactive video workshops present the most effective methods of holistic personal development...
Start off with a Free Life Assessment and a Free Consultation...
 

Have a question about Trans4mind Training?

Frequently Asked Questions
What Are Our Fees?
Email Peter Shepherd

Support your personal development with these popular and effective hypnosis downloads...

This is our selection of favorites, but there's a session for every need! Choose from over 800 Hypnosis Downloads...
Search now on an issue that interests or concerns you...
 

Welcome to the New Wave in Meditation Technology

Click here to learn more about the iAwake Profound Meditation Program
The iAwake Profound Meditation Program
is a way of enhancing your meditation practice, making meditation not only easier and more enjoyable, but also more efficient and effective.
Profound Meditation provides the smoothest, deepest, richest, most profound meditation experience available anywhere...
Here is a link to a free 20-minute track from iAwake Technologies - a sample of the type of tools that will deepen your meditation immediately and help you quickly become a successful meditator. It's the opening track of iAwake's flagship product, the Profound Meditation Program, called the iAwake Experience...
Learn More and Download the iAwake Experience
We think you'll find this technology a tremendous aid on your transformative journey of becoming your best and most creative self - and you can get started today!
And here's a fantastic resource for self-education...

The World of Inspiration eLibrary

World of Inspiration
A treasure trove of personal development wisdom

Step inside. Just like a real library, there are thousands of quality eBooks presented on three "floors" and in different "rooms." To purchase your $15 Lifetime Membership to the World of Inspiration eLibrary, click the following button:

Payment is made through our secure transaction agent, PayPal.
The transaction is in the language and currency of your choice.
"I want to just say 'WOW!' This collection is probably the best money I ever spent! I've already received many times over in personal enrichment after just 9 days. I've had a past metaphysical background, but even newcomers to this material will really benefit. Thanks again." ~ J.S. (Pennsylvania, USA)
"The collection is everything which you promised. And more! A superb contribution to the good of the world. Many thanks indeed." ~ R.P. (Georgia, USA)
"Just a short note of thanks for the library. I've only had membership for several days now but I already feel this is perhaps the most interesting compilation I have yet seen. Worth far more than the price of admission. The browser linked structure works well and makes it easy to manage such a large storehouse of information. It is rarely that I find something I like as much as this or that I feel strongly enough to write a note like this." ~ P.W. (Minnesota, USA)
Copyright © 1997-2016 Trans4mind Ltd