Trans4mind Home Page
~ A Journey of Self-Discovery ~

Explore Article Library


Christian Singles: Questions To Keep Your Spirit Alive

By Drew Harris

With special events like Valentine's Day coming and going each year, I am reminded how difficult it can be to retain your spirit of who you are when you're a Christian single.

It just sometimes feels like it would be easier to mold yourself into whatever your dating partners want, and then you can get on with living happily ever after.

Become what other people want you to be, date non Christians, etc.

I was recently reminded of this when I met up with a friend for coffee. As energetic, bubby, positive, social, million-miles an hour type of Christian girl, she was telling me about her new boyfriend. They had moved in together, he didn't like to socialize, he was quiet and reserved, and all they did was watch TV.

They didn't even put up a Christmas tree or lights this past holiday season, because he thought it was all a waste of time. This from my friend who usually wears a Santa hat for the entire month of December.

As we chatted, she kept justifying all of the things that they obviously didn't have in common. I then noticed her usually dancing eyes had lost their shine.

How sad, I thought. Why had she given up on her spirit?

During my many years of single life, I attended a workshop where one of the exercises was to write done all of the things that we were looking for in a partner. But in order to do that, we first had to write down all of the things that defined us as people.

This prompted an amazing series of Soul searching questions.

  1. What did I believe in?

  2. What role did God play in my life?

  3. What were my values?

  4. What was important to me?

  5. On career, did I work to live, or live to work?

  6. What did I do for fun?

  7. What hobbies did I have?

  8. What offended me?

  9. What did I consider to be right and wrong, moral and immoral, ethical and unethical?

  10. What were my politics?

  11. What were my dreams?

  12. What goals did I have?

  13. What about my family and the desire for more kids?

  14. What charities and causes did I support?

By defining what I wanted in another person, I was first clarifying and refining my own self image and my own spirit.

I developed a vision of my Christian singles partner, based on my own definition of what my spirit was (as opposed to the other way around).

I became more and more committed to sustaining my spirit while searching for a partner. As it turned out, when my spirit was challenged by some of the people I dated (if they weren't Christian or if we clashed on any of the answers to the questions above), I had the confidence and inner conviction to politely say good-bye and move onto the next person.

It still took me a long time to find the right person (or rather, she found me). I still had to suffer through a few more Valentine's Days, which always reminded me of my singleness. Yet, I came to realize that it had never been more important to know what I stood for.

You too can do the same. Answer those questions above and understand what you stand for.

Then you can continue your search for like-minded people. The Internet and website personals speeds that whole process up for you, letting you refine your search by specific age ranges, kids or not, divorced or not, white, black, location, income level, career path, values, etc.

Your spirit will truly sing when you start getting to know like-minded people.

By Drew Harris, Copyright 2005

You have permission to publish this article electronically or in print, free of charge, as long as the bylines and resource box are included. A courtesy copy of your publication would be appreciated. email bears@island.net.


AND EXPLORE...

Addictions
Astrology
Careers & Employment
Communication
Creativity
Dating
Depression
Diabetes
Diets
Divorce
Education
Environment
Ethics
Exercise
Family
Goal-Setting
Grief & Loss
Happiness
Health
Kids & Teens
Leadership
Love
Marriage
Meditation
Nutrition
Organizing
Parenting
Psychology
Public Speaking
Relationships
Schools
Self Help
Self Improvement & Motivation
Sexual Relations
Spirituality
Stress Management
Travel and Leisure
Women
Writing


From our extensive site, you'll find good info on many topics using this search:

Want to renew your life?

Our online, interactive video workshops present the most effective methods of holistic personal development...
Start off with a Free Life Assessment and a Free Consultation...
 

Have a question about Trans4mind Training?

Frequently Asked Questions
What Are Our Fees?
Email Peter Shepherd

Support your personal development with these popular and effective hypnosis downloads...

This is our selection of favorites, but there's a session for every need! Choose from over 800 Hypnosis Downloads...
Search now on an issue that interests or concerns you...
 

Welcome to the New Wave in Meditation Technology

Click here to learn more about the iAwake Profound Meditation Program
The iAwake Profound Meditation Program
is a way of enhancing your meditation practice, making meditation not only easier and more enjoyable, but also more efficient and effective.
Profound Meditation provides the smoothest, deepest, richest, most profound meditation experience available anywhere...
Here is a link to a free 20-minute track from iAwake Technologies - a sample of the type of tools that will deepen your meditation immediately and help you quickly become a successful meditator. It's the opening track of iAwake's flagship product, the Profound Meditation Program, called the iAwake Experience...
Learn More and Download the iAwake Experience
We think you'll find this technology a tremendous aid on your transformative journey of becoming your best and most creative self - and you can get started today!
And here's a fantastic resource for self-education...

The World of Inspiration eLibrary

World of Inspiration
A treasure trove of personal development wisdom

Step inside. Just like a real library, there are thousands of quality eBooks presented on three "floors" and in different "rooms." To purchase your $15 Lifetime Membership to the World of Inspiration eLibrary, click the following button:

Payment is made through our secure transaction agent, PayPal.
The transaction is in the language and currency of your choice.
"I want to just say 'WOW!' This collection is probably the best money I ever spent! I've already received many times over in personal enrichment after just 9 days. I've had a past metaphysical background, but even newcomers to this material will really benefit. Thanks again." ~ J.S. (Pennsylvania, USA)
"The collection is everything which you promised. And more! A superb contribution to the good of the world. Many thanks indeed." ~ R.P. (Georgia, USA)
"Just a short note of thanks for the library. I've only had membership for several days now but I already feel this is perhaps the most interesting compilation I have yet seen. Worth far more than the price of admission. The browser linked structure works well and makes it easy to manage such a large storehouse of information. It is rarely that I find something I like as much as this or that I feel strongly enough to write a note like this." ~ P.W. (Minnesota, USA)
Copyright © 1997-2016 Trans4mind Ltd