Trans4mind Home Page
~ A Journey of Self-Discovery ~

Explore Article Library


5 Tips To Keep Marital Bliss Alive After You Retire!

By Allie Ochs

Let's face it retirement is a time of great transition for spouses. Ample free time and drastic lifestyle changes can be a burden or a blessing for your marriage. Regardless of whether one or both spouses retire, the secret to a smooth transition is planning before you retire. For example, if one or both of you have been task-driven individuals with their own careers, a 7/24 marriage may not be to your liking. Retiring couples who have lived independent and relatively separate lives may become frustrated and bored being joined at the hip. Others may rejoice in spending more time with each other. The most important step to take prior to retiring is:

1. PLAN AHEAD. Know your personality and design your golden years accordingly. If you are a busy bee needing outside stimulation, plan ahead how you will keep yourself occupied. Get a part-time job, volunteer, write a book, get a pup, complete home renovations, play golf, join an organization or take up a hobby. Know what you will do with your excess time before you get on each other's nerves.

While retirement is a natural process of live, most retirees experience the same effects as with the loss of a job. No longer needed at work coupled with reduced social contacts many retirees question their identities. Feelings of worthlessness or even depression are common and can harm the quality of your relationship. You owe it to yourself and your spouse to:

2. LIVE WITH A PURPOSE. Shift the focus from yourself to others. Contribute your knowledge and life experience to organizations. Get involved with youth groups helping young people flourish. Socializing with your children and grandchildren will keep you young and alert. Read, cruise the Internet, exercise, learn a new language or skill. Do anything that keeps your brain working and your heart filled with passion.

If only one spouse is retiring, conflict over who does what and how time will be spent, may arise. The at-home spouse may be expected to do more chores including those they never did before. Arguments over time allotted for chores or play may develop. To avoid conflict:

3. EXERCISE MUTUAL RESPECT. As the still-working spouse, don't penalize your retired partner for having reached the golden years. Respect that your spouse deserves the freedom, time, enjoyment, respect and dignity of retirement. While he or she can be expected to pitch-in more, respect that your spouse needs the freedom to find his or her purposeful life as a retiree. Again, talk about and plan ahead how time will be spent prior to retirement, it will save you many arguments.

Staying busy has proven to be beneficial for all retirees. How to keep busy may vary from one person to the next. Because of diverse expectations it is often difficult to find the right blend of shared hobbies and time alone. Some couples are thrilled to do everything together, while others need and enjoy some time on their own. Allow each other to:

4. BE HAPPY. Retirement should be a happy time. It is about doing the things you couldn't before. This could be anything from sleeping in to travelling to unknown places. Anything from learning about astrology to helping provide clean water in an undeveloped country. Whenever possible you should support your spouse to live a happy retirement in alignment with his or her personality. Always remember, your partner is just as important as you are.

Many retirees use this time to strengthen their marriage. Previous work distractions and time commitments often lead to stale marriages. Now is the time to create intimacy and secure marital bliss in your sunset years. Get busy and:

5. KEEP THE LOVE GOING. Love is not something that you have, it is something that you do. Now that you have more time, be romantic. Plan for romantic dinners, movies, vacations or picnics. Compliment each other, cherish each other and surprise each other with romantic treats. Take time to talk to each other, communicate your feelings, your fears and your passions. Make love whenever possible, it is a sure way to create intimacy. Remember love has no expiry date and a loving relationship is your ticket to glorious golden years.

© 2005 Allie Ochs

About The Author
Allie Ochs is a speaker, relationship coach and author of: Are You Fit To Love? Her book has received the honorable mention at the USA 2004 Best Book Awards. She has appeared on TV, Radio and is published in numerous magazines and newsletters. Visit her website www.fit2love.com and take the Fit 2 Love test.

allie@fit2love.com


AND EXPLORE...

Addictions
Astrology
Careers & Employment
Communication
Creativity
Dating
Depression
Diabetes
Diets
Divorce
Education
Environment
Ethics
Exercise
Family
Goal-Setting
Grief & Loss
Happiness
Health
Kids & Teens
Leadership
Love
Marriage
Meditation
Nutrition
Organizing
Parenting
Psychology
Public Speaking
Relationships
Schools
Self Help
Self Improvement & Motivation
Sexual Relations
Spirituality
Stress Management
Travel and Leisure
Women
Writing


From our extensive site, you'll find good info on many topics using this search:

Want to renew your life?

Our online, interactive video workshops present the most effective methods of holistic personal development...
Start off with a Free Life Assessment and a Free Consultation...
 

Have a question about Trans4mind Training?

Frequently Asked Questions
What Are Our Fees?
Email Peter Shepherd

Support your personal development with these popular and effective hypnosis downloads...

This is our selection of favorites, but there's a session for every need! Choose from over 800 Hypnosis Downloads...
Search now on an issue that interests or concerns you...
 

Welcome to the New Wave in Meditation Technology

Click here to learn more about the iAwake Profound Meditation Program
The iAwake Profound Meditation Program
is a way of enhancing your meditation practice, making meditation not only easier and more enjoyable, but also more efficient and effective.
Profound Meditation provides the smoothest, deepest, richest, most profound meditation experience available anywhere...
Here is a link to a free 20-minute track from iAwake Technologies - a sample of the type of tools that will deepen your meditation immediately and help you quickly become a successful meditator. It's the opening track of iAwake's flagship product, the Profound Meditation Program, called the iAwake Experience...
Learn More and Download the iAwake Experience
We think you'll find this technology a tremendous aid on your transformative journey of becoming your best and most creative self - and you can get started today!
And here's a fantastic resource for self-education...

The World of Inspiration eLibrary

World of Inspiration
A treasure trove of personal development wisdom

Step inside. Just like a real library, there are thousands of quality eBooks presented on three "floors" and in different "rooms." To purchase your $15 Lifetime Membership to the World of Inspiration eLibrary, click the following button:

Payment is made through our secure transaction agent, PayPal.
The transaction is in the language and currency of your choice.
"I want to just say 'WOW!' This collection is probably the best money I ever spent! I've already received many times over in personal enrichment after just 9 days. I've had a past metaphysical background, but even newcomers to this material will really benefit. Thanks again." ~ J.S. (Pennsylvania, USA)
"The collection is everything which you promised. And more! A superb contribution to the good of the world. Many thanks indeed." ~ R.P. (Georgia, USA)
"Just a short note of thanks for the library. I've only had membership for several days now but I already feel this is perhaps the most interesting compilation I have yet seen. Worth far more than the price of admission. The browser linked structure works well and makes it easy to manage such a large storehouse of information. It is rarely that I find something I like as much as this or that I feel strongly enough to write a note like this." ~ P.W. (Minnesota, USA)
Copyright © 1997-2016 Trans4mind Ltd