Trans4mind Home Page
~ Making the Human Heart Visible ~

Looking for a better life?

Our online, interactive video workshops present the most effective methods of holistic personal development, combined with personal support from expert life coaches.

Explore Article Library


Is Silence Really Golden?

By Oscar Bruce

"DEAR Dr. OSCAR. Why does this happen to me? Someone introduces themselves to me. I tell them my name. Then suddenly I realize I can not recall their name."

MY RESPONSE... "Simple, you didn't forget their name - you never really heard it in the first place. Your focus was on yourself and not the other person."

A Zen phrase says, "To see, you must get out of the middle of the picture." Remember - you're in the middle of your own picture. So, how best to move the focus from yourself to others?

The great psychologist, Carl Rogers, said, "Listening is the most powerful force we know for releasing potential in others. Real communication occurs when we listen with understanding - to see the idea and attitude from the other person's point of view, to sense how it feels to them, to achieve their frame of reference in regard to the thing they are talking about." This is the key to becoming a master motivator and persuader.

Dale Carnegie, the father of positive thinking, said, "You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years trying to get other people interested in you".

Over my 40 years as Author and Coach in the art of personal communications, I've learned that a happy and successful life is rests on the quality of ones relationships. And nothing affects the quality of relationships more than the willingness to listen to the opinions and feelings of others.

YET LISTENING IS THE FORGOTTEN ART.

Don't you find it fascinating that some people have all the answers before they've heard the question? Most people do not listen with the intent to understand - they listen with the intent to reply. The first rule of skillful listening is - Don't start thinking about your reply before the other person has exhausted their entire view or feelings.

Most people try to be interesting when they should be interested. The truly successful communicator is a curious person. They want to know more about what other people think and feel. They are truly fascinated by what other people can share with them.

HOW TO MAKE PEOPLE FEEL YOU UNDERSTAND:

Use the following "perception checking" questions. Try this exercise with a friend or someone you trust.

Person 1

Start talking about any subject for 4 or 5 sentences.

Person 2

When the first person stops talking, repeat back to them what you thought you heard, starting with phrases like: I want to be sure I understand what you are saying. It sounds like...What I hear you saying, if I understand you correctly is...I want to make sure I am hearing what you are saying...

People like people who make them feel special. Listening to a person makes them feel special. When you make them feel special, they then view you as special. This causes their interest in you, your dreams and goals to increase dramatically. They become more willing to help you achieve your goals and objectives.

SOMETIMES DREAMS NEED A LITTLE HELP

Let's face it, in America one can achieve just about any dream. But, sometimes a dream needs a little help from others. The cooperation you need from others will be in direct relation to your willingness to listen to the story of their own dreams and ambitions.

About The Author

Oscar Bruce's concepts are widely known for helping people learn to share their dreams and ambitions, clearly and persuasively. His FREE NEWSLETTER is available at http://www.oscarbruce.com

Additional information and access to his free newsletter are available at http://www.oscarbruce.com

Copyright: 2005

Article Autoresponder: mailto:Is_Silence_Really_Golden@epublishersresource.com

Author Contact Email: mailto:oscar@forwardpromotion.com

TERMS OF REPRINT - Publication Rules

The requirements for publishing this article are:

  • You May Not change the content of the article, except for minor corrections for layout, typos or grammar.

  • You May Not use this article in UCE (Unsolicited Commercial Email). Email distribution of this article MUST be opt-in email only.

  • If you post this article on a website, you MUST set any URL's or email addresses in the body of the article or in the Author's Resource Box as hyperlinks (clickable links).

  • Please, if possible, forward a copy of the ezine or newsletter in which you published the article, or if on a webpage, the link to the article, to the author.


AND EXPLORE...

Addictions
Astrology
Careers & Employment
Communication
Creativity
Dating
Depression
Diabetes
Diets
Divorce
Education
Environment
Ethics
Exercise
Family
Goal-Setting
Grief & Loss
Happiness
Health
Kids & Teens
Leadership
Love
Marriage
Meditation
Nutrition
Organizing
Parenting
Psychology
Public Speaking
Relationships
Schools
Self Help
Self Improvement & Motivation
Sexual Relations
Spirituality
Stress Management
Travel and Leisure
Women
Writing


From our extensive site, you'll find good info on many topics using this search:

Support your personal development with these popular and effective hypnosis downloads...

  • Public Speaking Fear ~ Banish speaking anxiety and nerves with hypnosis.
  • Motivate Yourself to Exercise ~ Build a powerful exercise habit that you can't break.
  • Get Rid of Fear & Anxiety ~ Stop worry and apprehension wrecking your life.
  • Self Esteem ~ Break the negative trance of low self esteem and give yourself a chance in life.
  • Create Your Own Reality ~ Use the power of your unconscious mind to transform your life.
  • Deeper Self Respect ~ Use hypnosis to connect with your true inner worth.
  • Detach From Fear ~ Tune out nervousness and anxiety with hypnosis.
  • Improving Concentration and Focus ~ Learn how to discipline, direct and command your mind to improve your performance.
  • Exercise Motivation ~ Give you powerful keys to getting back on track with your exercise - and staying there.
  • Overcoming Shyness ~ Provides an invisible security blanket allowing you to develop social ease and overcome shyness.
  • Quick Confidence Booster ~ An audio hypnosis session that's specifically designed to get you (quickly!) back on track.
  • Stop Negative Thoughts ~ Learn powerful hypnotic techniques to stop negative thoughts before they start.
  • Overcoming Procrastination ~ Let hypnosis help you get on with what you need to do, when you need to do it. Let nothing hold you back.
  • Think Thin ~ Use hypnosis to re-train your brain and lose weight naturally... that's how to get and stay slim.
  • Fall Asleep Fast ~ Relearn how to fall asleep fast and enjoy a good night's sleep.
  • The Next Level ~ Designed to radically boost your performance in any field. It's based on a technique used by top athletes and other successful people to help them make a big stride forward.
This is our selection of favorites, but there's a session for every need! Choose from over 800 Hypnosis Downloads...
Search now on an issue that interests or concerns you...
 
Get a free Hypnosis Download at Facebook
Copyright © 1997-2016 Trans4mind Ltd