Trans4mind Home Page
~ Making the Human Heart Visible ~

Looking for a better life?

Our online, interactive video workshops present the most effective methods of holistic personal development, combined with personal support from expert life coaches.

Explore Article Library


Boost Your Job Search with the Buddy System

By C.J. Hayden, MCC

Remember back in grade school when the teacher asked you to hold hands with a friend on field trips? The idea behind the buddy system is that it's much harder to get lost if there are two of you traveling together. When you get into trouble, your buddy can help you out, or find someone else who can.

Maybe you could use a buddy in your job search. The constant challenges you encounter while seeking out job opportunities and going on interviews make job-seeking a difficult road to travel all alone, and it's easy to get lost. Teaming up with a job search buddy can give you:

Perspective - A different point of view on your progress or challenges. Just hearing your problem restated by another person can give you new insight that will help you find a solution.

New Ideas - A partner for brainstorming and an extra pair of eyes and ears to spot opportunities. You can double the amount of knowledge and experience at your fingertips.

Accountability - Someone other than yourself to whom you are accountable -- who will ask you once a week what you have done so far, and what's next.

Support - Space to complain or celebrate out loud, with someone who cares about your progress. If you're facing a roadblock, grousing about it for a few minutes may be all you need to get back into action. And having someone to share your success with can make it much sweeter.

While you could use your spouse, best friend, or a co-worker to provide this extra help, the individuals closest to you may not be the best choice. The people in your personal life will not always be thrilled with how much time you're spending on looking for work, and your co-workers may tend to sidetrack you with day-to-day job issues. You may find it more helpful to find a buddy who can maintain some detachment, but who also understands the importance of your job search.

You and your buddy can assist each other in reaching your goals by setting up a regular check-in, where each of you reports on progress, announces successes, and describes challenges. The buddy's job is to listen, celebrate, commiserate, and be a brainstorming partner. Here's how to make the buddy system work for you in job-seeking:

1. Set a fixed time to talk. Whether you meet by phone or in person, set a start and end time for your conversation. Half an hour is enough; an hour is plenty.

2. Check in about goals and action steps. Make a brief report about where you are with your job search and what steps you have taken since your last meeting. Keep your check-in brief and to the point, e.g. "I got one interview this week, and set up two appointments for networking lunches. I revised my r'sum to include more of my past accomplishments, and applied for three new job openings." Acknowledge your buddy's progress and celebrate his or her success.

3. Help each other solve problems. Ask your buddy to first just listen while you tell him or her what's going on and clear your emotional reaction to it. Your buddy can say things like, "Gee, that's tough," or "How awful!" but should not offer any advice until you are through. Talk about not only what is happening, but how it makes you feel. If it sounds like complaining, that probably means you're doing it right.

You might say something like this: "I've been trying for two weeks to finish my r'sum", and there's just been one emergency after another, and now my mother wants me to help sell her car, and I'm so frustrated! All the words I write down just come out wrong, and I don't think it'll ever come together, and I needed it yesterday, and I'm so worried that..." You get the idea.

Set a time limit of 5 minutes for reporting and clearing. At the end of that time, ask your buddy to summarize for you: "I hear how frustrated and worried you are. You seem to have two problems that need to be solved -- finding the time to work on the r'sum", and getting the words to come out right. Are you ready to look at some solutions?"

4. Brainstorm possible solutions. Your buddy's job is not necessarily to hand you the right answer -- his or her more important role is to help you expand your thinking to come up with some new ideas. Take your problems one at time, and together with your buddy, make a list of possible solutions. Don't edit the list as you are brainstorming; include anything and everything that comes up. You are not allowed to say, "That won't work," or "I already tried that."

Here are the potential results of a brainstorm on getting the right words for a r'sum":

  • hire a r'sum writer

  • plagiarize my friend's r'sum"

  • use the thesaurus

  • ask my cousin the writer to help

  • do a r'sum with only pictures

  • don't use a r'sum at all

  • look at sample r'sum's on the Internet

  • take a class in how to write a r'sum"

  • use what I have and stop worrying

  • have some colleagues review it

5. Decide on your next steps. If none of the brainstormed ideas seem right, look at each one to see if there's something useful in it. Maybe you can't afford a r'sum writer, but you know one you could ask for a word or two of free advice. Perhaps a class would take too long, but you could check out a book from the library. Find just one thing you can do that will get you moving toward a solution.

Regardless of any problems you try to solve during your session, always end by naming what steps you will take on your job search before your next meeting. Write these steps down - both yours and your buddy's - so you can check in about them next time.

6. Keep the relationship reciprocal. Make sure each of you gets an equal amount of time at your meetings. If you end up spending the whole session on one person's problem, devote the next session to the other buddy. Keep your buddy in mind as you make new discoveries and meet new people, and share any opportunities you uncover. The buddy system works best when you do for your buddy what you would like your buddy to do for you.

About The Author

C.J. Hayden is the author of Get Hired Now! and Get Clients Now! Since 1992, she has helped thousands of professionals make a better living doing what they love. C.J. is a Master Certified Coach who leads workshops internationally - in person, on the phone, and on the web. Find out more about C.J. and get a free copy of "How to Find a Job in 28 Days or Less" at http://www.gethirednow.com.


AND EXPLORE...

Addictions
Astrology
Careers & Employment
Communication
Creativity
Dating
Depression
Diabetes
Diets
Divorce
Education
Environment
Ethics
Exercise
Family
Goal-Setting
Grief & Loss
Happiness
Health
Kids & Teens
Leadership
Love
Marriage
Meditation
Nutrition
Organizing
Parenting
Psychology
Public Speaking
Relationships
Schools
Self Help
Self Improvement & Motivation
Sexual Relations
Spirituality
Stress Management
Travel and Leisure
Women
Writing


From our extensive site, you'll find good info on many topics using this search:

Support your personal development with these popular and effective hypnosis downloads...

  • Public Speaking Fear ~ Banish speaking anxiety and nerves with hypnosis.
  • Motivate Yourself to Exercise ~ Build a powerful exercise habit that you can't break.
  • Get Rid of Fear & Anxiety ~ Stop worry and apprehension wrecking your life.
  • Self Esteem ~ Break the negative trance of low self esteem and give yourself a chance in life.
  • Create Your Own Reality ~ Use the power of your unconscious mind to transform your life.
  • Deeper Self Respect ~ Use hypnosis to connect with your true inner worth.
  • Detach From Fear ~ Tune out nervousness and anxiety with hypnosis.
  • Improving Concentration and Focus ~ Learn how to discipline, direct and command your mind to improve your performance.
  • Exercise Motivation ~ Give you powerful keys to getting back on track with your exercise - and staying there.
  • Overcoming Shyness ~ Provides an invisible security blanket allowing you to develop social ease and overcome shyness.
  • Quick Confidence Booster ~ An audio hypnosis session that's specifically designed to get you (quickly!) back on track.
  • Stop Negative Thoughts ~ Learn powerful hypnotic techniques to stop negative thoughts before they start.
  • Overcoming Procrastination ~ Let hypnosis help you get on with what you need to do, when you need to do it. Let nothing hold you back.
  • Think Thin ~ Use hypnosis to re-train your brain and lose weight naturally... that's how to get and stay slim.
  • Fall Asleep Fast ~ Relearn how to fall asleep fast and enjoy a good night's sleep.
  • The Next Level ~ Designed to radically boost your performance in any field. It's based on a technique used by top athletes and other successful people to help them make a big stride forward.
This is our selection of favorites, but there's a session for every need! Choose from over 800 Hypnosis Downloads...
Search now on an issue that interests or concerns you...
 
Get a free Hypnosis Download at Facebook
Copyright © 1997-2016 Trans4mind Ltd