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Heal Your Child Within

By Deborah Sexton

Inner Child Exercise

The Three Within

Every human has three Archetypal personalities within the mind.

The Parent-The Adult and The Child.

The Parent is the part of us that tells us what we should and should not do. This is the part that scolds or rewards us

The Adult is the mature rational mind that can communicate on a calm, logical level.

The child is the part of us that takes risks, tries new things and is also the part of us that acts up.

Understanding these three distinct parts of our personalities can help tremendously when trying to understand and deal with ourselves and others. We can begin to recognize which one we are relating to and therefore respond to.

For instance if two people are interacting with one another and one person is trying to be mature and logical (Adult) but the person who he is speaking to responds by throwing a tantrum (Child) than the first person may decide to cut the conversation short to wait for another day (Adult) or switch to his own Parent personality to deal with the Child of the other person. Of course the Adult could also switch to his Child and a fight could ensue

The Adult within us should always be the one in control, at the same time allowing the other two personalities to come forward when needed and at appropriate times.

For instance, two people going on vacation to relax and have fun, could choose to allow the child within to rule until the need for the Adult arises.

The compatible personalities of two people relating are Adult to Adult (Relates in a Mature Manner) Child To Child. (Relates in a playful manner) Parent to Child. (Relates in a guidance manner)

The personalities of two people relating which causes chaos are

Parent to Parent (Two people telling each other what to do) and Parent to Adult. (An Adult speaks and the Parent orders) Child to Adult (The Adult tries to speak in a Mature manner, the child in the other gets angry etc causing the Adult to walk away or switch to the Parent)

The Child Personality

At one time in our lives and up to a certain point which is different in us all, our only personality was the Child. During this time is when most of the molding of who we are took place. This is when we developed courage or fear, self love or self loathing and all of our personality traits.

To begin the work of bettering our selves we must first begin with the child personality. The Parent and Adult within us are who they are because of what was instilled into our Child within.

Many years ago I was having some difficulties and meditated about them. That night I had a night vision (A vivid dream) In this vision I saw myself holding me as a child. I realized the child I was holding was the hurt helpless child within. I hugged the child and told her how beautiful, valuable and loving she is. I told her I was sorry for everything she had gone through and how much I love her. My child within hugged me back very tightly and clung to me with tears.

I sobbed as I came out of this vision. I was never the same after this dream and continued comforting my child personality. It has been a great healing tool in my life.

The Exercise

You may sit up or lie down (The problem with lying down is that you may drift off to sleep and never finish the exercise. I sit in my favorite recliner and kick back a notch. This way I am not having to sit up straight, and have less chance of falling asleep). I am guiding this exercise using feminine pronouns because I am female. However if you are male just replace them with masculine pronouns.

Count backwards slowly from 9-0, do it three times

Relax your muscles from toes to head to jaw line.

Put your lips together and part your teeth.

"See yourself sitting in a rocking chair. Rocking back and forth, back and forth. Feel and see your Child emerging from your belly and standing before you. See yourself as vividly as possible the way you were as far back as you can remember.

See your Child look into your face. Lift your Child up and sit her on your lap. Now continue to rock back and forth as you hold your Child. Touch her hair and face. Squeeze her gently in your arms. Tell your Child that from now on you will take care of her and will protect her. Express to your Child how sorry you are for all the pain she has experienced. Continue rocking and comforting your Child. Say whatever you feel you need to say to this very gentle part of you. See your Child melt back into your belly and become a part of you again"

Become aware of your surroundings and sit in your chair till you feel you are done.

Keep It Up

Keep your child in your mind and from time to time bring her out and comfort her and assure her She is loved.

About The Author
The Light Barrier

Copyright © Deborah Sexton 2005

I am a Ordained Minister, Reiki Master and Mystic, I have been initiated into a truly mystical, magickal system of spirituality and way of life, the Kabbalah. Come Visit Us.


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