What Does Vision Have to do With Creating Confidence?
By Sarah Malik
It can be difficult to translate our insight and inspiration into reality, to take our joy and sustain it once we are out in the world, to be who we really are once we are out of the comfort zone and into action.
It is one thing to say we feel comfortable with who we are and another thing to actually live that way.
It is one thing to say we don't care what other people think and another thing to act like it.
In order to be successful in developing our confidence, then, we must step back from our very real experience of anxiety, to realize that it is a manifestation of our old beliefs - habitual reactions engrained in the body and mind.
And then seek ways in which we can continue to pursue the realization our new beliefs until our experience-creating, bodily habits begin to catch up.
So now, if you are feeling inspired to bring your full self into the world, but continue to feel nervous about doing it, then I strongly encourage you to remember that your experience may take time to catch up and that success and confidence are still yours - even if it doesn't feel that way right now.
So what can we use to support our efforts as we take this journey to total confidence?
Vision is one tool that we can use to bolster our resolve and strength when our reality has not yet caught up with our desires, when anxiety comes despite our commitment to feel comfortable with who we are.
And how specifically can we can develop our vision and use it to strengthen our ability to develop our confidence?
The first step in using vision to develop our confidence is to ask:
"What do I want? What kind of experience do I want to create?"
Begin by charting out your dreams.
What are your dreams?
There are two tricks here.
First, do not let the *how* get in your way. You may not know how to get where you want to go. You may not even believe that it is possible. But just begin to explore what you dream of - without judgments or assessments. Give yourself the gift of some free exploration.
You can learn more about *how* to create what you want later. The most important thing for now is to give yourself permission to search your dreams!
The second trick here is for you to get as specific as you can.
If you say you want confidence, what does your experience of confidence look like? Feel like? Sound like?
If confidence had a smell, what would it smell like?
The more details you can fill in, the easier it will be to create.
If you are like most of us, you know very well what you *don't* want. You don't want to feel anxiety. You don't want to stumble on your words. You don't want to look bad in front of others.
But we can't really get what we want if we only know what we DON"T want.
Look at it this way. What comes to mind when I say, "Don't think about pink flowers!"
What did you think about?
Pink flowers, right?
Our brains don't register the "don't think part. Our brain goes right to the vibrant image of fresh, fragrant pink flowers.
So if you want to experience confidence, then get very familiar with what you do want.
Don't waste any more time on what don't want. Because it"ll only expand your experience of it.
So now, when you go into action in the world, when you begin to interact with others and you begin to sense the feeling of fear or anxiety bubbling up inside of you, you can think to yourself, "What do I want? You can call up the experience of what you want - rich with details. And see if you can recall the specific description and experience that you have articulated above.
In the beginning, you may only be able to do this for seconds at a time. But keep trying. You will find a tipping point of sorts where your experience of confidence will begin to gain an edge on your experience of fear. When your new beliefs will begin to become the habit of your brain and body.
And ah! What a beautiful day that will be!
About The Author
©2005 Sarah Malik is dedicated to helping people reduce their anxiety and increase their confidence, so that they can experience freedom and self-expression - No matter where they are and no matter what they are doing.