Here we are near at the beginning of another New Year... and I'd like to suggest one simple two-pronged resolution for all my readers to keep for the entire year... in order to prove to yourselves what a difference it will make in your lives. One small resolution... a very different life.
Be grateful every day for five different things or qualities in your life that have been there on this day.
Be grateful every day for five different people that have been in your life on this day and have somehow added to the quality of this day.
What would happen if furthermore you made the decision to be grateful for something...even the smallest little something... every single time a negative or worrisome or stressful thought or feeling entered your mind or heart?
Can you imagine what a difference that would make? It would mean that instead of spending a major portion of your thinking time on things that bog you down, you would be spending it on things, or people, or qualities you are grateful for. Don't misunderstand me: I don't mean to imply that you should not spend time on solving your problems, but I do mean, that that only requires a certain amount of finite time every day, week, or month, depending on what the problem is. Once that portion of time has been used to try to solve the problem to the best of your ability, go elsewhere with your thoughts and feelings.
As this is quite difficult for many people, simply because it is not a habit, and simply because so many of us believe that if we don't think about our problems all the time, we are not being serious about our lives, what I am suggesting here is even more simple.
Rather than trying to figure out how to think of something that makes you feel good when the worrisome or negative thoughts hit, be grateful for something. This is very easy to do, once you get the hang of it...
The second prong to this resolution is just as simple, although just as unaccustomed, and thus will also require a bit of practice to make it a habit. Remember, once it's a habit, you'll do it without needing to remind yourself, and new habits can be formed in as little as three weeks, if you keep reminding yourself to do the new thing.
Send the intention of love from somewhere inside of you to at least five different people every day that do something to annoy you, make you impatient, anger you, etc. Instead of thinking (or speaking) the invectives you normally would, ask yourself to intend love for that person. You might say something like this in your mind: May love fill your life. Or: Go in love.
That's it. If you still need to speak to this person about something, do so only after having gone through this nano-second exercise in your mind. Your words will generally come out differently than they might have if you had not done this first.
I hope you understood that the purpose for this is first and foremost your own inner state of well-being and balance. In other words, although you are sending something positive to the other person, which will translate into an energetic transmission that is beneficial to them, it is, in actual fact, destined to make you feel better, rather than how you would feel, if you gave in to your primordial instinct to snap at them, or send them invectives from car to car, etc. (Before you pooh-pooh this, remember how much you can feel if you enter a room full of hostile people, or happy people, or worried people...most of us are able to feel what others are feeling in certain circumstances).
Furthermore, this is not about you being a wimp. It is not about you not speaking up for your rights. But it is about you being - living - taking yourself into a higher energetic frequency simply by the way you react to situations and by the two-pronged resolution you make.
Remember, the more you do this, especially during the first 21 days, the more it will become a habit.
Once it's a habit, you will want to have the benefits of this process, and you will find it harder and harder not to do it, i.e., you will eventually do it automatically.
You can choose to ignore this, ridicule this, or decide that it is not for you, because it simply doesn't apply to your life, or you can choose to do this. This much I can guarantee you: if you choose to do this, your life will alter dramatically and for the better. The energy inside of you, and the energy you will attract towards yourself will increase in your benefit. Such a decision also forms part of your journey towards inner freedom.
Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D. (Psychology), author of Rewiring the Soul, is a practicing psychotherapist who works with an international clientele in Marbella, Spain using an integral focus on body, mind and soul. She has published a newsletter in English and Spanish since 2004, facilitates monthly workshops and broadcast a weekly radio show both locally in Spain, as well as on the internet for seven years. Prior to her work in private practice she was Director of Sales & Marketing at several luxury beach properties in Spain and Mexico and was married to a diplomat. She has three sons.
Read more articles by Gabriella at the Counterpoint Article Library.