Sometimes I eat something to give myself comfort or a reward. The problem is that although it might feel good at the time, afterwards I often don't like how I feel afterwards.
It reminds me of a very good friend that I had when my children were young. We met at my son's nursery school and for many years we spent at least a few afternoons a week talking together.
However, as the years went by our thinking and our lives started going in different directions. Nevertheless, I was still in the habit of calling her whenever I wanted to talk about something, and often about something that was bothering me. I called her because I wanted to be comforted and to feel better.
After a while, I noticed that I never felt better after we talked. I expected to, but instead I always felt worse. It took some time before I would admit that it was true, and even more time to stop the habit of reaching for the phone.
If I did call her, afterwards I would ask myself how I felt, and I really took the time to experience the feeling. Over time, the desire to stop that "bad" feeling was stronger than the habit, and I was able to stop calling her for comfort.
There are many things that we all do out of the habit of giving ourselves a reward, or trying to find comfort, which produce the exact opposite results.
The first step in stopping this behavior is to become aware of it, and admit that it's happening. From there it is much easier to recognize the people, places, and things that actually do provide comfort to us.
However, there is always a place we can go to be comforted, and at the end of the day, it is the only place we will ever feel permanently comforted. It is to the place of Truth about who we really are and what God Is.
Instead of looking for solutions and comfort in the very place that caused the problem and discomfort, we must disengage from that thinking. We must separate ourselves from the worldview and our habitual thinking and behaving from that standpoint.
What we call the world is the subjective condition of what we believe to be reality. Realizing this we can turn from that false reality from which we will never derive consistent comfort. We can then choose to begin and end our thinking in the Reality of ourselves as the subjective condition of the One Mind thinking.
As that reflection and outcome of Spirit, God, there is no need to be comforted since there is nothing ever wrong.
This is not an "airy-fairy" solution to a problem in which we simply turn away from what is causing us pain and pretend that it doesn't exists by saying, but not really understanding, statements like, "God is Love." Turning away or hiding from problems that begin within the false thinking of the worldview is more than foolish. It is dangerous.
When we stand in the Truth of only One Mind, it requires us to face what claims to be the problem and see clearly the lie that it is telling. There is no hiding, or running. Instead, there will be a dissolving of the problem.
We can get to this awareness in two ways. By either arguing from and about Truth within our own thinking, much like when an attorney argues for the innocence of his client, or having moments of complete awareness of the presence of Truth. Although we yearn for those moments of clear Light, we more often find ourselves arguing for the logic of Truth as opposed to the illogic of the worldview.
Either way, we must make this shift from small r reality to big R Reality and live it. We cannot say to ourselves, "God is Love" and then act unloving to others and ourselves. The demands of staying within Truth and not being swayed by the fear or love of the worldview can be hard at times. Nevertheless, it is the only way.
Our discomfort is a self- imposed prison, but we are not helpless. When we can give up thinking that we are in charge and turn instead to the Truth of our being, the prison will dissolve. However, we must be willing to give up all our old beliefs, and our cherished ideas of how we want situations in our life to resolve.
We can find permanent comfort in knowing that instead of being the subjective state of the worldview, we are--in Reality--the subjective state of Love. The result of beginning and ending our thinking in this premise is the guarantee that our needs will always be met in the most appropriate form for the time, and in ways we could never engineer ourselves.
Beca developed an easy system to do this called The Shift and has been sharing how to use this system to expand lives, and bring people back to the Truth of themselves for over 40 years.
Beca and her husband Del Piper are constantly working to develop new ways to support and reach out to others. Much of what they have been developed can be found for free at their membership site Perception U.com. They also founded The Women’s Council with the intent of “strengthening the connection to yourself, to others, and to the Divine.”