After fear, anger is probably the next most debilitating emotion that humans must confront. Unlike fear, anger is a complex emotion. And unlike fear, which usually paralyzes, anger can spur you to take action, though not necessarily in a beneficial way. Reacting to anger-provoking events will usually make things worse.
If you analyze why you or anyone else ever gets angry, it's almost always because expectations did not match reality. Here's a simple example: You order butter pecan ice cream from a Baskin Robbins store and they tell you they don't have any. You're angry. Why? Because you expected to get butter pecan ice cream from an ice cream store with 31 flavors, but the reality was they didn't have any.
Now, if you had ordered ice cream from a Starbucks and they told you they didn't have any, you wouldn't be so angry. Why? You still didn't get your ice cream, but since coffee shops don't generally serve ice cream, you wouldn't have expected to get any. Not getting what you want by itself does not make you angry - only when your expectations are not met do you get angry.
Expectation is a quality of the mind. We have built up our expectations based upon our past experiences and how we’ve interpreted them. We then project these expectations into the future. Consequently, anger is a quality of the mind. As such, "folk remedies" such as jumping, running or punching a bag or pillow will be largely ineffective. Following these suggestions will make you tired, but you’ll still be angry. And yelling at people whenever you feel angry is also counterproductive. (Not to mention, increasing the likelihood of receiving a beating from people who don't appreciate getting yelled at.)
The pop psychology "let it out" anger reactions are also mostly unproductive. This is because as a mental quality, you cannot use lower vibrational, physical energy to diffuse your anger. As Einstein said, "No problem can be solved at the same level of consciousness that created it." This means you can't use physical means, or even a mental means, to solve a mental problem. You need to invoke a higher level of consciousness. You need a spiritual approach.
What to do? Immediately accept the reality of the situation and become fully present. Only when you are present can you consciously decide if it's best to take action now or continue to accept the reality. Do not resist the reality. Your only two healthy choices are to act or to accept.
Complaining is nonacceptance, which will perpetuate your anger. It turns you into a victim, which the Law of Attraction tells us will bring you even more of the stuff you're complaining about.
Suppressing your anger is also nonacceptance. You still have your anger; you just buried it. It will still attract more anger, and, most likely, it will resurface when you least expect it. You must act or accept.
Anger has no benefit, other than to tell you that you are acting unconsciously, that is, REACTING, based on habit or past experience. Getting angry is a habit that we all have experienced. If you catch yourself, you have taken a step towards higher consciousness.
Here's a more specific example: You're attending your annual performance review. You did a great job for your company and expect a pay raise. You present all your accomplishments to your boss, pointing out the value you added to your company, and you request a raise. Your boss says "no." What should you do?
Remember, act or accept. Anger has no place in this equation. You've already acted to give yourself the best chance for a raise. Further action, at this time, is not likely to change things. Given this, you must accept the situation completely and totally, without judgment or anger.
Assume that everything is exactly as it's supposed to be. You were not supposed to get a raise. The universe conspired to get you exactly what you and your higher self requested. This could be the stimulus to get you to take enlightened action in another direction. You will want to meditate and figure out what that is. Then you can choose to act consciously to create the preferred reality that matches what you want.
This may involve updating your resume and networking with industry contacts for a new job. Or it may involve working on plans for your own business. In either case, taking conscious action will uplift you. You will be amazed at the amount of abuse you can tolerate, when you know that the situation is only temporary because you are taking action to create the reality that you want. You don't even have to tell anyone else; all you need to know is that you are taking enlightened action. Your spirit will soar.
The fundamental principle at work here is that you are not your mind. Since expectations are creations of the mind, they are not needed. Your true self is beyond the mind.
In a longer term course of action, you will want to dis-identify from or eliminate the thoughts and emotions lodged in your energy bodies that are framing your expectations. In many cases, these thoughts, feelings and beliefs are not even yours! They were instilled in you by your parents, teachers, religious leaders, peers, co-workers, bosses, the media, etc. You accepted them and they are framing your experience of reality today.
When you recognize this is what's happening, you will more easily release them. One of the best ways to do this is while meditating; by being fully present with the single-minded intention to clear them from your being.
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Edwin Harkness Spina is an award-winning author and speaker. Ed is dedicated to presenting practical mystical techniques to improve people's lives and expand their minds. His workshops and seminars emphasize the practical application of these techniques to help others manifest their dreams.
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