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Managing Life

By Charlene Proctor

Intuitively, I know I've lived many lifetimes, and none more interesting than the one I'm living now. However, being born an old soul somehow did not excuse me from the same job I share with you and that is learning to craft a positive attitude about daily adversity. With a set of mental thought patterns to process our soul journey wisely and lovingly, we can become an observer of our own life. If we have this belief firmly within our grasp, our perceptions of people, career paths, or even our living conditions change dramatically, allowing us to experience our environment in wonderful ways. We can sift out what we want to include in the day's lesson and discard the rest, feeling in control, no longer running on automatic programs. We can feel victorious, energized by circumstances, not victimized. All of a sudden, we notice we have created a fabulous reality based upon our intentions.

As a pre-requisite to having a good life, a lot has been broadcast from the self-help community about the importance of 'stepping into a vision of who you are.' What does it mean? Our modern day mystics and philosophers are referring to self understanding. The self is your rendition of the Spirit within you, your individual spark of divinity. Your God/Goddess within is your true self you become over time. It is your journey to being whole.

Realizing our own divinity, and using it to create a reality free from angst and disappointment, is about living in conscious awareness of who we are. All the time. And we practice being divine by making choices based in the present, using a creative license to choose what we want. If we recognize the Divine within, and identify intimately with that idea, so there is no differentiation between what is God and what is us, then we are capable of anything. Our choices, just like the universe, become limitless. Our purpose then, in this collective soul journey we share, is to become that which is within. It is to become our God-self. It is our inheritance, our innate gift and natural state.

I have not always been this smart. Like you, I have stumbled from one hard lesson after another over the course of many years, wondering why I seemed to revisit the same type of relationships or never felt in charge of my destiny. Why did the same patterns emerge in my career paths? The same disappointments? From bitterness over family matters to love gone astray, I found myself thinking 'life happens' or 'it was never meant to be' far too often, as an unspoken acceptance of my lack of ability to overcome.

Beginning as children, we readily accept conditioning by such mantras of non-control, turning our power over to other ideas, food, relationships, religion or materialism. By adulthood, we gather quite a large collection of anesthetics, choosing to bed down with them for long winters of discontent, blaming outside circumstances for our reality. Only we find we aren't any closer to our goals the following spring, we've just invested more energy convincing ourselves why it's not time to receive our good. And this is our biggest mistake. Life is not a nuisance to push through. It is designed to be so much more and I think, living within the genius we call the Universal Creation, our shared experiences all point to the same signpost: Thoughts Create Reality. This Way . It is our choice whether to travel on that path of enlightenment or not.

The complexity that permeates our lives has little to do with what we completed on the to-do list, but much about our difficulty to experience the life we want. There is no plot against us. We've outlined these challenges for our own self-development because we are trying to leave ourselves clues that we are mentally capable of overcoming our environment. We are attempting to teach ourselves we have the ability, present in our own minds, to experience the world as a creator, living life fully and consciously aware. We can manifest what we want. It only takes practice!

How We Blow It
Rather than going within for power to create joyful lives, too often we look to the environment or relationships. Naturally, we crave reinforcement and praise. Who doesn't feel good when a sign arrives, encouraging us to keep putting one foot in front of the other? Feeling we make a difference is important, but where we get into trouble is functioning completely on automatic thought patterns to get the positive strokes.

Physiologically speaking, we wire our brains by our associative memory - our associations with people, places, things, times or events - and assign emotions to those ideas. It causes neurons in the brain to form a connection and when enough connect together a whole series will fire. That's called a neurological network. They are developed by repetition. Neuro nets help us function because they provide our bodies with the ability to function automatically with skills sets such as brushing our teeth, walking or typing. But because humans are complex beings, we're highly integrated in terms of the body and mind. Emotions associated with those complex skill sets can become triggered automatically, affecting our behavior and our bodies by the production of chemicals. Our bodies begin to rely upon those chemicals. No kidding - scientists found we can be addicted to our emotions!

Automatic programs don't serve us well when we rely upon them to propel us through life. For example, if you had abusive parents you may have created a memory of that relationship. Over years of repetition, you might have created an automatic program around this set of ideas, which included certain emotions such as low self-esteem, anger, or resentment. Emotions begin to be problematic only to the degree that we are unconsciously surrendering to them in ways that don't serve our highest good. How can we recognize when this happens?

An example would be the automatic program that kicks in when something triggers your memory of your parents. You respond to people who remind you of your parents, or other authority figures, the same way chemically. Most of the time, we don't even realize our dependency on these old programs that prevent us from experiencing healthy, new relationships. Old programs affect our present day circumstances, clouding present-day judgments and opportunities for wonderful experiences because we are using old information, responses, and body chemistry to interpret the way things are today. It's not an accurate assessment of reality.

What can you learn from this quick tutorial in Brain 101? If you produce the same outcomes in life, over and over again, it may be a demonstration of what is, in fact, an old program in your head. You are recreating the same conditions to produce the same chemicals your body craves. For example, surrounding yourself with people who make you feel like your parents made you feel, so you have an anger outlet. Or, substituting loneliness for love because you don't want to open yourself up to the possibility of rejection. So, until the pattern of memory is broken by detaching from emotions you associate from this past relationship, you will continue to search unconsciously for similar experiences. Why? Our bodies naturally seek the chemical comfort. And many of us rely upon such automatic programs without even realizing it! We are more chemically attached to our bodies than we think, often making present day choices based upon our bodies and minds seated in the past.

However, there is hope. Because our brains are more elastic than scientists originally thought, we can actually mold them by creating new programs that help us function. What technical expertise do we need to accomplish this? There is very little. We must simply be strong enough to choose what we want to experience, exercising free will. And we need to remember that conscious mind is comprised of power and intention. To produce change in our environment, we need to consciously change. It requires effort!

Fortunately, with the blending of quantum theory, neurophysiology, nanotechnology, brain imaging, mysticism, and some plain common sense, experts are finally confirming what we already intuitively know: we are in charge of manifesting our own reality. Their reasoning? If we continue to build a positive and loving mindset (a memory of our associations with people, places, things, events, and times) that helps us interact with the world in the present moment , life is perceived as a positive experience. We can create new memories to inform a new, present day reality. Pretty soon, our bodies accept it, and we see external changes in our lives which become proof of our own efforts.

We can prune our old connections in our brains, dismantling old networks that no longer serve us well. We can create new neuro-nets just by practice. Just by opening to the concept of forgiveness, we can release old perceptions of relationships and consciously create room for the really good emotions. Reality is based upon how our brains are wired and a good attitude. Everyone has the same opportunity to do so. And that perception can either liberate us or hold us back. People are already doing it. It's called the consciousness movement.

Affirmations Help Reprogram Your Brain
It takes a lot of awareness to mentally and emotionally clean house. If we regularly experience self-doubt, unworthiness, or fear, and can arrest the thought process (know the stimulus that turns those emotions on), and gracefully move our minds to new ways of being, such as receptivity to self-love, opportunity, confidence, abundance, or adventure. We can observe our circumstances objectively and gain dominion over life, feeling emotions we want to experience and those we don't. Science now suggests we can measure the bodily effects of conscious awareness and positive thinking, in the form of more energy, clear thinking, stronger immune systems, and enhanced reasoning power.

My book, Let Your Goddess Grow! , in the most practical, lighthearted way, points to where your stress might arrive. It gets you to think about how you might have created past patterns of negative thinking. To change your reality, you first need to construct new neurological networks - new patterns of thinking. It's a discipline learned over time, but our bodies are designed to participate in this conscious process. How do we get started?

Training the mind is part of living in conscious awareness of our environment. It is helpful to recognize old useless emotion - for example 'feeling your needs come last,' 'fear,' or 'low self-esteem' - then repeat positive statements, such as affirmations, with sincere belief and conscious intent. More practice equals the greater the level of acceptance of that thought. An affirmation is simply a positive statement, a declaration to the universe that you choose to take the upper hand and never accept anything than what you deserve. My affirmations are deeper and more complete self-help messages we can use to change stale thoughts around when the impulse hits. They are prayerfully contemplative, encouraging you to retain a spiritual focus on the big picture.

Let Your Goddess Grow! tutors you to recognize negative thinking before it becomes a habit. A series of 7 lessons are presented on how to become more attuned to that which gives you the foundation of success at work and home. These lessons will help you re-focus your energy and intentions. You'll learn how to thwart negativity by shifting your thought patterns throughout the day. Remember, you must choose to see something negative in a positive light and reprogram your response to that stress. When your reactions change, you can begin to cultivate a new life, filled with robustness, prosperity, love, good health, and happiness.

Move Forward and Know That All is Well!
Remember, we can survive but we can always do better than that - we can create our desired reality. There really doesn't seem any other way to live - how healthy can it be to choose to stay underneath piles of loss, disappointment, grief, and old family resentments? There is only one way out and that is to dust off your boots and climb out. I will help you take the first step and find courage, energy, and inspiration in the process. In that way, together we can become modern, female beacons of light, guiding even the most demanding curmudgeons we encounter.

Above all, know that we are beautiful entities - and the soul's journey is a gift, a miracle. We are beloved treasures who have an incredible opportunity to learn. People who are our greatest critics are there for our own benefit. By harnessing our own capabilities to create a world where we express our own divinity, we can evolve together. And who knows where it will lead? Consciously engaging in the process of true self discovery will certainly give us more comfort in knowing we are meant to be here, exploring our limits. And, with a light heart and a good attitude, I think we will find it easy to share our wisdom and insight with others on the same workpath. We just might find a bit of humor in our daily journey, and yes, even love for those around us who are helping to refine our soul. My greatest wish is that you can join me in thanking them for allowing us yet another opportunity to grow.

Let Your Goddess Grow! 7 Spiritual Lessons on Female Power and Positive Thinking, written by bestselling author Charlene M. Proctor, PhD. (and now available in paperback for only $15.95), teaches you how to create a balanced life that allows your authentic self to shine through. You'll learn to recognize what negative thought patterns have held you back in the past. And you'll have the tools to generate prosperity and be more resilient. Quite simply, you'll feel refreshed and ready to roll into the New Year with grace and a positive attitude!

With the purchase of Let Your Goddess Grow!, you will also receive Charlene's brand-new Self Development Journal valued at $9.95. This journal is an amazing tool you can use on your own or with your self-help focus group. Buy your copy here:

P.S. If you would like more affirmations that will help you reprogram your mind and get you on the path to creating new neurological networks, Charlene has written a companion book called The Women's Book of Empowerment: 323 Affirmations That Change Everyday Problems into Moments of Potential. It's a quick way to find the source of your stress, anxiety or negative thinking and quickly readjust. Use it in conjunction with Let Your Goddess Grow! I know you will be able to make better sense out of life.

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