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There's More to Life than 'Going through the Motions'

By Kristina Jansz

Your life is meant to be a dazzling expression of all that you are. There was a time when you knew this to be true. It was your truth! You committed to experiencing each moment with your entire being. Your heart was wide open, you believed everything was possible, you knew you could do anything and the radiance of this knowledge shone in your face and sparkled in your eyes. That was before you were told to be practical, reasonable, responsible, and "could you please get your head out of the clouds". And with that, you shut down and grew up.

Since then, you've been doing all the right things and taking well-charted roads. Each day you get up and conduct your life according to the conscious and subconscious guidelines laid out for you by parents, family and society. You do what's expected of you. You're a good person, responsible, reliable and reasonable.

So why, then, is there a voice deep inside you saying, "I can't do this anymore! I feel like I'm suffocating." To those on the outside, your life looks wonderful but inside, it feels empty, as if somehow you're living a lie. You don't feel a connection with the life you've worked so hard to create. Daily, you go through the motions but in your heart you know there's something fundamentally wrong. Your rational mind tells you to "snap out of it and be grateful for what you have" but your heart won't be silenced. You feel like you're going crazy.

Let me say here that no, you're not going crazy. Your internal, emotional "egg timer" has gone off and it's time to review the approach you've been taking to living your life. In other words, this is supposed to happen. I fondly refer to it as emotional puberty. It's similar to physical puberty in that it is essential to your overall maturation process and it's going to happen whether you want it to or not. The difference however, is that unlike the physical version, emotional puberty doesn't happen in your youth. It's also important to note that once thought to be a 40's 'event' and thus nicknamed the "mid-life crisis", more and more people are now hearing this call an earlier age.

The sound of the egg timer signals a time when some adjustments are necessary to get back on track with your truth. It does not mean you have to leave your family, relationship or job and you don't have to get a sports car, hairpiece, enhancements and a young date. It does, however, mean that the time has come to review the beliefs and behaviors with which you've been living your life:

  • Are they yours or someone else's?
  • Are they aligned with the truth of who you really are, as they were when your face shone and your eyes sparkled?
  • Have you been making choices from a place of fear (of what your life will be if you do or don't do certain things) or from a place of truth?
  • When you get to the end of your life will you look back and say "Wow, I lived the most wonderful and fulfilling life!"

If your goal is to live a deeply fulfilling, joyous and inspired life then there are some things that have to happen now. To begin with, you cannot accept 'going through the motions' as a way of life. You need to become conscious of how and why you're living each moment. Call up those emotions of agitation and discontent that have been troubling you and become clear about what you're feeling. To put it simply, Wake Up!

Once you do, you'll probably find that some changes are required. The process of change can feel overwhelming at times, so much so that you may think your only choice is to do something drastic in order to break free from the stress. While it may seem as though this is the only solution, facing your feelings of discontent does not mean that you have to walk away from everyone and everything in your life. When you find areas that are off track, don't let it slide. Get focused, peel back the layers, figure out where the disconnect is between where you are and where you want to be and then make small, sustainable changes in the direction of your goal. Not only is this easier to achieve, it's also less traumatic on those around you. If, like most people, you find that you're too close to your issues to see the forest for the trees and you need help to gain some clarity, reach out and get it!

This may sound like a lot of work but really, it isn't. In fact, this process is so incredibly freeing that most people wonder why they didn't "wake up" sooner. Your life is meant to be a dazzling expression of all that you are. You're not meant to go though it half-asleep, settling for less, shutting down and numbing your pain. You're supposed to go for it and so, when you do, you reconnect with the greater flow and consciousness of life of which we are all apart. This is a very powerful force. If you saw the movie 'Finding Nemo' you'll remember the scene in which the turtles are plodding along in the ocean, moving very slowly and unenthusiastically. Suddenly they step into the East Australian Current and take off at great and effortless speed, whooping it up and having the time of their lives. Well, that's what its like! It's the difference between simply existing and truly living.

When you begin living your truth you will be filled with a renewed life force, the likes of which you probably thought you'd never experience again. You will live with a sense of joy, enthusiasm and vitality that you believed only belonged to childhood.

Start by listening to that little voice inside, the one that tells you something doesn't feel right. Don't brush it aside. It's your truth. It's that shining, dazzling aspect of you waking up and wanting to live.

Kristina Jansz, Life-Skills Trainer, Writer and Speaker works in Barrie, Ontario, Canada and offers Personal Empowerment Programs, Workshops and Talks. For more information visit Kristina Contact information: phone 705 794-9900, email
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