Trans4mind Home Page

Are You an Introvert That
Others View as an Extrovert?

By Linda Sapadin, Ph.D

As with any dual classification system (smart-stupid, shy-bold), most people don’t clearly fit into one category, even when others think they do. You may be a smart psychologist, yet a really stupid physicist. (Umm, do you imagine I’m talking about me?) Or, you may be shy in one environment, bold in another.

This is because personality traits exist on a spectrum of contexts. Though some people fall closer to the extremes, most of us are somewhere in the middle. Hence, though others may perceive you as an extrovert, you alone – since you know what’s going on inside of you – may identify yourself as an introvert.

If this describes you, read on:

  1. You enjoy spending time with others. But every night? Not a chance. It’s simply too much people time, not enough alone time (which is precious to you).
  2. Yakety, yak, yak small talk drains your energy. You may look like you’re at ease, but on the inside, you’re just trying to figure out how to make a quick exit.
  3. In contrast to small talk, in-depth talk on topics that interest you revs up your energy. When you’re with people you relate to, chatting away on topics that interest you, you appear to be an extrovert. Indeed, you may even enjoy being the center of attention.
  4. Calm environments appeal to you. Loud noise, frenetic energy and lots of people make you uncomfortable. That’s when you just want to get out of there and go home to some peace and quiet.
  5. You often feel anxious before an event, worrying about who will be there, whom to talk to, what to wear, etc. etc. That anxiety may stretch out to the event itself. Yet, as the evening progresses, you warm up to people. If they seem truly interested in you, you reveal more of who you really are.
  6. Though you like people, you don’t have loads of friends like extroverts do. Only a few friends. But that’s fine with you. You don’t need lots of people in your life. Just a few special ones will do.
  7. When people cancel plans, you may actually feel more relief than disappointment. You now have free time and you don’t have to worry about the details of getting together, especially if it’s a large social engagement. Plus, you’ll have more time alone or with that special someone in your life to do what you want to do.

If you’re relating to this description of introverts whom people mistakenly view as extroverts, know that there’s a word to describe you. No, it’s not confused; it’s an ambivert. Not a total introvert or extrovert but someone in the middle. A good place to be, I would think, as most extremes create problems both for themselves and others. So smile, amiable ambivert - appreciate who you really are!

Copyright © 2018: Linda Sapadin, Ph.D
Linda Sapadin is a psychologist and personal coach in private practice who specializes in helping people enrich their lives, enhance their relationships and overcome self-defeating patterns of behavior. For more information about her work, contact her by email or visit her website at PsychWisdom.

Share on Facebook   Share on Twitter   Share on LinkedIn
More Goals & Life Coaching articles
Latest Additions

Good info on many topics:

Tools for Transformation

personal development
Trans4mind offers its visitors a huge range of complimentary personal development resources for self-directed education and transformation of the whole person...
Introduction to our Tools for Transformation. We aim to open up the mind to new ideas, new challenges and new solutions - to think differently and be creative.
Here are our favorite quotes. The best quotes distill powerful wisdom into a few words and can make a real difference to our perception and understanding. Including:
Life  Purpose, Spiritual  Awareness, Success and Abundance, Wisdom from the Heart, Happiness and Wellbeing, Communication & Relationships, Motivation and Leadership, Parenting and Education, Emotional Intelligence, Transitions in Life, Social Community, Quirky Quotes, Creativity, Proverbs, Humor - and many further topics in the Wisdom from the Heart section.
Articles by Peter Shepherd and Wallace Huey. Imagine if the values of the heart could be brought into our families, communities, charities, organizations and businesses... what kind of a world would this create?
Audios by Peter Shepherd, focused on key personal development topics, to help advance your personal growth.
A free meditation program to help you experience the state of unconditional love - key to lasting joy and fulfillment in your life.
Become more clear about your own identity, what you want in life - your life vision - and how to manifest your full potential. And then move on to the free New Life Course to advance in many further ways.
If we do actually have a soul, then where does it go after death? Near-death experiences provide convincing answers.
Check out our fascinating collection of complete books for you to read online, including Peter Shepherd’s Transforming the Mind, which created the foundation of this site back in 1997.
Over 250 PDFs to freely download covering many personal development topics - and including the range of Trans4mind publications.
Free personality test based on the Eysenck Personality Questionnaire. See yourself as others may see you, in a more objective light, so you can know yourself better.
Our site is expansive, including loads of helpful resources. See what else we have.

Check out the menus on the top of every page too!

Hypnosis Downloads

Support your personal development with these popular and effective hypnosis downloads...

This is our selection of favorites, but there's a session for every need! Choose from over 800 Hypnosis Downloads...
Search now on an issue that interests or concerns you...

View all the Hypnosis Downloads here

Copyright © 1997-2018 Trans4mind Ltd
Terms of Use & Privacy Policy       Email Webmaster