Trans4mind Home Page
~ A Journey of Self-Discovery ~

Deep Respect

By Claudette Rowley

If you respected yourself deeply, what choices would you make?

I've been asking this question a lot lately. In my experience, we don't spend as much time as we should thinking about the ways in which we respect and disrespect ourselves. And yet, many of our decisions - at least unconsciously - are based on that very fact: whether we're willing to deeply honor what we want/need or whether we're willing to settle for less.

As humans, we're able to say we want something, proclaim that we desire it strongly and still internally block it. Why? Because we're afraid. Sure, we grow up learning to tell ourselves that we're not afraid. We cover our fears with a veil because they make us feel vulnerable. Acknowledging fear is important, though - the very recognition is a litmus test of sorts. Of course, I'm not suggesting that you wallow in your fear, get stuck there or use it as excuse to not move forward.

Rather, it's an opportunity to be honest with yourself: How do I really feel? What does the fear tell me? In what ways do I need to be courageous?

Deep respect is comprised of two important principles:

  • You never settle for less than what you truly want.
  • You know when to take charge and when to let go.

Let's explore the concept of never settling for less than what you want. This about knowing your own worth and internalizing the belief that settling for less is never worth it. Settling costs you at every level - physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and financially.

Sometimes I hear comments like, "Isn't it selfish to focus on what I want?" And I answer, "No, it's not selfish. Knowing what you want and taking action based on that information puts you in greater alignment with yourself." And when you are in alignment with who you are and what you want, you act with greater ease, energy and clarity. As a result, you have more to give others, you're more productive at work and at home, and you make an even greater contribution to the world.

In any situation you face, ask yourself, "What do I want out of this situation?" Gaining that clarity will transform your life, particularly if you take the corresponding action.

Now let's examine the balance between when to take charge and when to let go. In each moment, we're called to accept what is. And particularly when we're uncomfortable with a situation, we have multiple choices - and most of our choices fall under the headings of either "taking charge" or "letting go."

Taking charge requires taking action: either through thought, word or deed in order to get our needs met. Taking charge does not mean complaining, rehashing old details or blaming other people. It's simply determining to the best of your ability what needs to be done and doing it - no matter how afraid, nervous or apprehensive you might be. You identify what's not working for you and take the steps to articulate and act on what you need.

Letting go means that you've chosen to release a situation, a person or an outcome. In some cases, you choose to withdraw your energy and free yourself. In other cases, you take charge or set an intention and then choose to remain unattached to the outcome.

When we're in the grip of fear, we often do the opposite. When taking charge is required, we convince ourselves that we simply need to put up with what's happening. When letting go is necessary, we hold on for dear life. While this is a common fear-based response, it's universally counterproductive.

Here's the great thing about deep self-respect: you don't have to earn it, prove that you deserve it or go out and acquire it. It's available to you each minute of every day. It's yours for the taking. Use it as your barometer, your scale, your measure of deeply understanding what's most important to you.

If you respected yourself deeply, what choices would you make today?

Copyright © 2007 Claudette Rowley
Claudette Rowley, coach and author, helps professionals identify and pursue their true purpose and calling in life. Learn more at Claudette


Looking for a better life?

Our online, interactive video workshops present the most effective methods of holistic personal development, covering the full range of challenges all of us inevitably meet in life.
Start off with a Free Life Assessment and a Free Intro Session...

Have a question about Trans4mind Training?

Frequently Asked Questions
What Are Our Fees?
Email Peter Shepherd
More personal development articles at the Counterpoint Article Library

Good info on many topics:

Support your personal development with these popular and effective hypnosis downloads...

  • Sweet Tooth ~ Train your brain to lose your sweet tooth.
  • Finish What You Start ~ Sprint all the way past the finish line.
  • Do It Now ~ A hypnosis audio to trigger deep, emotionally driven activity.
  • Life Priorities ~ Hypnosis can help you clarify what really matters to you.
  • Stop Thinking About Someone ~ A session to help you move on from thoughts that have been constantly pestering you.
  • Public Speaking Fear ~ Banish speaking anxiety and nerves with hypnosis.
  • Motivate Yourself to Exercise ~ Build a powerful exercise habit that you can't break.
  • Get Rid of Fear & Anxiety ~ Stop worry and apprehension wrecking your life.
  • Self Esteem ~ Break the negative trance of low self esteem and give yourself a chance in life.
  • Create Your Own Reality ~ Use the power of your unconscious mind to transform your life.
  • Deeper Self Respect ~ Use hypnosis to connect with your true inner worth.
  • Detach From Fear ~ Tune out nervousness and anxiety with hypnosis.
  • Improving Concentration and Focus ~ Learn how to discipline, direct and command your mind to improve your performance.
  • Exercise Motivation ~ Give you powerful keys to getting back on track with your exercise - and staying there.
  • Overcoming Shyness ~ Provides an invisible security blanket allowing you to develop social ease and overcome shyness.
  • Quick Confidence Booster ~ An audio hypnosis session that's specifically designed to get you (quickly!) back on track.
  • Stop Negative Thoughts ~ Learn powerful hypnotic techniques to stop negative thoughts before they start.
  • Overcoming Procrastination ~ Let hypnosis help you get on with what you need to do, when you need to do it. Let nothing hold you back.
  • Think Thin ~ Use hypnosis to re-train your brain and lose weight naturally... that's how to get and stay slim.
  • Fall Asleep Fast ~ Relearn how to fall asleep fast and enjoy a good night's sleep.
  • The Next Level ~ Designed to radically boost your performance in any field. It's based on a technique used by top athletes and other successful people to help them make a big stride forward.
This is our selection of favorites, but there's a session for every need! Choose from over 800 Hypnosis Downloads...
Search now on an issue that interests or concerns you...

View all the Hypnosis Downloads here

Get a free Hypnosis Download at Facebook

Hypnosis is the key to unlocking your creativity, focusing your energy and understanding yourself

Hypnosis has a long history of helping human beings be the very best they can be. It can be used to control anything controlled by the unconscious mind - pain, blood pressure, fear, confidence levels, mood, sex drive... the list goes on:

  1. You'll become highly productive without getting stressed
  2. Tap into your creative energies instantly
  3. Really understand yourself and others
  4. You'll learn how to stay calm in high pressure or uncomfortable situations
  5. Develop laser-like levels of focus and concentration

Lean more... Uncommon Hypnosis Course

Copyright © 1997-2017 Trans4mind Ltd