Perhaps you are wondering: what does it mean being my own leader? Well, among the aspects of being your own leader are that you are your own authority, you think independently, you live your life on your own terms, and you are authentic. And this regardless of whether it is popular or not, regardless of whether it is cool or not, regardless of whether it is trendy or not, regardless of whether it is common or not, regardless of whether your friends, family and peers think in the same way or not.
If you are your own leader you will find the inner freedom to be who you really are, and you will begin to know what your power is.
Sometimes we forget that on this planet we are more than 6 billion people, and that there has never been, there is not and there never will be another you. You are totally unique in your qualities, characteristics, likes and wants. You have a magnificent mind, a mind that would enable you to be, have and do anything you truly want in your heart of hearts.
But some people are so afraid of what other people think that they do not use their magnificent mind, they do not use their power. They are afraid to be unpopular, to be alone, not to be liked, not to be accepted for who they are, and they compromise their identity, their own unique magnificence, in order to be someone they are not.
And so they do things they later regret, they say things they later regret, they behave in ways that are not true to themselves; and later in life they realize that actually they have betrayed themselves in doing that. And the reason why they do this is simply because they do not like themselves enough to refuse to compromise on who they really are.
So, do you like yourself? And I am not speaking about superficial vanity, but about love. Do you cherish the most important person in your life; yourself? Do you cherish yourself enough to be who you really are, to stand up for who you really are, to treat yourself with kindness, to brush yourself off every time you fall, to keep going even when it is tough and it seems that you are alone?
If you are your own leader you decide what you believe in, you decide what is right for you, what feels right for you, you decide your values, your code of conduct, your ethics, and your morals; you decide what you think about things; you think with your head and think critically about all that is offered. You do not believe blindly everything you hear or see, but you carefully evaluate them, you choose what you believe in; you choose your thoughts, you choose what you say, you choose your life. You decide what you are going to do in your life, what you are going to create in your life. And your values, your choices, and your thinking will be the foundations of your life.
And there is nothing that you "should" do, have or be; you choose everything. You are your own authority. And this means taking the risk of being alone, of not being liked, of not being popular, of being rejected, but with the enormous treasure of being true to yourself.
And the funny thing is that when you are true to yourself, and it seems that you are unpopular, the truth is that people will actually like you more, because you are authentic, because you are doing something that they wish they could do themselves, and you are also showing them courage and the possibility that they could be able to be themselves as well.
Sometimes it might seem easier to follow rather than to lead yourself, less effort, but this is just at the beginning, and once you learn to be your own leader, everything is effortless. There is a quote that sums it up wonderfully:
"If we value independence, if we are disturbed by the growing conformity of knowledge, of values, of attitudes, which our present system induces, then we may wish to set up conditions of learning which make for uniqueness, for self-direction, and for self-initiated learning." --Carl Rogers
So, what are you going to choose?