Effective Tips To Keep Your FWB Relationship Rocking
If relationships were automobiles, the friends with benefits relationship would have the highest crash rate. This moment you're sure that you've got this FWB thing under lock, and the next moment wondering: "how did we get here?"
Or you're probably wondering what an FWB relationship is.
A "friends with benefits" arrangement is a relationship where two people agree two have casual sex without any romantic commitment attached. FWB dating relationships are so popular, research suggests that over 50% of people in their 20s have had such a relationship at least once.
As popular as FWB relationships are, they are quite spontaneous as they are not exactly guarded by strict rules. But as they say, a race car without brakes is a disaster waiting to happen. If all that passion and energy in "friends with benefits" arrangements are not tamed by certain rules, then all you've got is a cruise waiting to crash. Thus, the more conscious you are of sticking to these tips, the safer your FWB relationship is. Here are a few tips to keep your FWB arrangement cruising.
Keep Your Emotions Out the Door
This rule is not only primary in order but also primary in priority. If any other rule got broken, this rule ought to be kept in check. You must keep your emotions outside the door when stepping into a "friends with benefits" relationship. Mind you, you should take your heart in. In this context, this means don't be heartless. Be kind and warm as you'll be to everyone else, but don't get mushy. To facilitate these connections, FWB dating sites have emerged as platforms where like-minded individuals can find each other. Diana Parkinson wraps her wealth of experience in a few words: “For ‘friends with benefits’ to work, you need to know how to keep a lid on your emotions without coming across as totally heartless.”
Stick to the First Word of the Code: "Friendship"
An FWB arrangement via dating sites will only thrive on the basis of friendship. This person you're getting down with has to be your buddy, not just at the beginning of the arrangement but through every moment of it. This person should be someone you can laugh with and laugh at without restraints. Keep the friendship thriving, because it is the lubricant that makes the frictions disappear.
Keep the Terms Clear
Communication need not be as constant as in a proper relationship, but it must be clear. FWB relationships create spaces where the lines can get blurred so easily. This is why you have to keep paying attention to boundaries and keep drawing the lines clearly. According to relationship therapist Clevescene, "communication is about the "where and whens" of hooking up. You are not building an intimate relationship, but rather just having fun and enjoying one another physically.” These boundaries help you understand when you are stretching the limits of your FWB relationships. It also shows you what to do to get back on track.There are no hard and fast rules to boundaries in your FWB relationship as each one has its peculiarities. This is why you should have a conversation about it. If this means drafting certain "do's and don'ts" or signing a written agreement, please do. Almost no effort is extreme in keeping the lines clear.
Choose the Right Person
In choosing a friend with benefits, the best way to chart your course is to picture the end from the beginning. When this ends, would you want this person to still be in your space? If your answer is no, then you should rule out a workmate, neighbor, or childhood friend who has pretty-much become family. You want to consider a sister's friend's cousin's lawyer or some guy who is in town for a business trip. You also should consider this person's emotional capacity. Do they get attached easily or find it hard to detach? Are they overly jealous or find it hard to handle their emotions? These pointers lead you to the most suitable partner for you.
There are several other important things to look out for, these being the most fundamental of them all. It is also important to have safe sex and always keep in mind, what this is and why it started.
Cheers to an ecstatic cruise.