Things to Keep in Mind When
Starting a New Relationship
Ah, love. The very building block of life. Human beings cannot do without some love in their life. It is to us what air and light are to plants. Not that we don't need those things too, but it's just as important! And the most magical part, traditionally, of any relationship we get into, are those first few months when everything is new and fascinating, and you get butterflies in your stomach all the time.
Fun as it is, those are also home to some of the most crucial times you will encounter. Those few months, in the beginning, are what will shape the course of your entire relationship, for better or for worse. Of course, love is different for everybody, but there are a few general things you should be keeping in mind when dealing with this phase of a relationship.
In this article, we will be taking you on a tour of the many things you can do to set a solid foundation for the relationship you are or will be stepping into. So, without any further ado, let's get right to it!
Be Open And Honest
Honesty and openness are the most important things you can offer your partner, so don't start with deception. Be honest about everything from the beginning. Be upfront about your likes, dislikes, and hobbies. Don't try to be or act cool by pretending to be someone you're not. This might be a popular trope in Hollywood dramas, but trust us, you don't want that kind of drama in your life!
What you present is what you will receive, so ask yourself how you would like to be lied to. It's not a pleasant feeling and reduces trust in the other person. And without trust, no relationship has room to grow and flourish. So, be yourself and don't feel like an impostor in your own skin. You are already good enough.
Set Expectations Early
Many misunderstandings happen later in a relationship because people enjoy the moment and don't talk about the long run. The great question of "Where are we going?", though so often played for laughs in the media, is a very important one. People need to know what they can expect and are signing up for so as not to get disappointed further down the line.
It is perfectly normal to have different expectations. Not everyone will want a relationship, and those that do might have differing expectations. It is up to the parties involved to decide where they are going and how they handle the many hurdles along the way. Be honest, be open, and be accepting. It is the best way to deal with this.
Be Willing to Try New Things
In the early stages, you will be trying to get to know and understand the other person. There will be awkwardness, a lot of shame, and tons of uncertainty. Your partner will need some coaxing to tell you everything they like and enjoy, and if you find that you like the same things, then there's nothing better. However, there is a chance that you won't know what they mean. It is always best to keep an open mind and be willing to try new things.
By doing this, you're sending the message that this is a safe space and that you are willing to extend your comfort zone to accommodate them and their tastes. Trust us; gestures like these will go a long way to building trust.
Don't Ridicule Each Other
As a couple, of course, you will be making jokes and poking fun at the other person, but be careful that you don't ridicule each other. There is a fine line between having fun and making fun, which you need to understand early on. You've decided to open the gates of trust, and if when they are opening up, you decide to make fun of it, they will clam up, and you'll lose all the progress you made.
Test the water. Always err on the side of caution, and don't say anything you wouldn't like to hear about your own interests. Respect the differences between you both, and always remember that not everything is a joke.
Create And Respect Boundaries
Only an unhealthy relationship has no boundaries or, worse, does not respect them. It might seem like the ultimate show of love to have no boundaries, but that simply does not work. Healthy boundaries are normal because not everyone will be comfortable crossing all lines. Every individual needs their own space and time, and they should not be denied this.
Sometimes, despite being in a relationship, all you want to do is read a book or play a video game. That is your time, and everyone needs time for themselves. There will also be things that you don't want the person doing because these things bother you, and your wishes should be respected for a healthy relationship to flourish.
Make Time For Each Other
This might sound like a given, but it needs repeating. You are in a relationship because you want to spend more time with each other, but you also have a life. Between work, chores, and other responsibilities, the time for romance might get cut short. As adults, this is to be expected and is easily understandable, but don't let that stop you from creating moments for yourselves.
Send voice notes between chores. Send them links to songs you like. Send texts or have short phone calls. Send them selfies. Do whatever you can to keep yourself in their mind. They will appreciate it, and the constant keeping in touch will lend itself to practicing good communication, making you both happier to be with each other.
Practice Active Communication
This one comes in handy for everyone, but it's especially relevant for new couples. You have to give each other your full attention and listen actively when the other person is speaking. You have to tell each other what is going on, where your mind's at, and all the other important conversations you will end up having. You need to pay attention and take advantage of their honesty.
You have to have the courage to state what's on your mind and have enough faith in your partner to be able to say it without fear of offense. That is the only way to have proper conversations, and that is also the way to gain each others' respect. Communication is the glue that holds a relationship together, and you want to build a strong base for your future happiness.
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The start of a new relationship is like the blossoming of a new bud in spring. It is beautiful but fragile and needs a lot of work and love to keep that way. With everything you have gleaned from this article, we do not doubt that you will keep the flames of your love alive for years to come. Good luck, and happy loving!
About the Author:
Marques Coleman is a contributing writer at https://taimi.com/ - the world's largest LGBTQ+ platform. He is a proud LGBTQ+ activist, as well as a researcher on human rights violations. Marques has a passion for writing about relationships and queer issues.