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How to Get Back on Your Feet After Divorce

Marriage certificate and a rose cut in half with scissors, representing how to get back on your feet after divorce.

Divorce is difficult; it is crucial to learn how to deal with it.

By Stephen Jones

Going through a divorce is difficult and painful. Many married couples struggle with issues and decide to stay together just for the sake of staying married. While that works for some people, others find it difficult and file for divorce. Furthermore, it is true that everyone handles difficult situations in their own way. Not everyone can recover quickly. For that reason, I am writing this article to share some knowledge out of my experience, and help you to get back on your feet after divorce.

Things to know

Before you can start dealing with the divorce, there are a couple of things that you must understand. There are some hard truths you must accept, and it is better to do it sooner than later.

Accept the reality
Just accept that you are divorced, and there is no going back. The most dangerous thing you can do is to stay in denial. The hard truth is, you placed your trust into someone's hands, and things didn't work out. It is how it is, accept it and move forward. You can still feel a whirlpool of emotions, and that is perfectly fine.

Do not hold grudges
No matter what happened, it is never advisable to hold grudges. You will remain under a lot of stress, and you will be nervous and angry all the time. Keeping grudges only stops you from feeling happy and moving forward.

It gets easier with time
You will feel better after some time. No matter how hard it is now, just say to yourself that time heals everything. It is important not to rush anything. Take as much time as you need, and you will notice the progress when it happens.

How to get back on your feet after divorce

After realizing truths about the divorce, it is time to start working on yourself. That is the best way to get back on your feet after such an event.

Think about how you look at life
When people go through a difficult situation, they like to have a fresh start. One thing you can do is change your perspective on the world. We all have opinions, and they are all different. Try looking at things from a different perspective, and open your horizons to new and fresh views.

Find good things in your life
Look at your life and discover for yourself what are some good things in it. It is important to value and respect what you have. Most of all, it is important to love all the good things in your life. Daydreaming about better times and wishing for something you don't have is just lying to yourself. Instead, cherish all the good things and moments you have.

A drawing of mother, father, and two children torn in half.

When a family goes through a divorce, children are those who are affected the most. Concentrate on them!

Surround yourself with positive people
The best way to overcome a difficult situation is to apply a positive approach. Surrounding yourself with positive people and thinking positive thoughts is how you get back on your feet after divorce.

You can also read books about motivation and positive thinking. Still, it is crucial to understand that you shouldn't act like everything is ok if you don't feel it. Pushing negative feelings and covering them with fake happiness is a recipe for failure. Give yourself time to process everything, but set a positive goal for your future.

Find a new place
After the divorce, it is good advice to change where you live. I am not saying that you should buy a new apartment or a new house, not everyone has enough money for that. However, even a rental can feel like home.

Go through the apartment listings and find something affordable and cozy. Furthermore, divorced couples and couples who go through a breakup like to change their stuff to have a fresh start. If your personal belongings remind you of bad times, get rid of them and buy new ones.

Spend time on improving yourself
Working on yourself is always a good thing. Read books, learn new things, and find new hobbies. All these new things in your life will help you to stay busy and not think about bad memories. It is also true that the healing process shortens as you keep yourself occupied with interesting activities.

Exercise
Working out strengthens both mind and body. Join the gym, and start exercising regularly. Two to three times a week is more than enough.

Dumbbells and running shoes with a Pilates ball in the back.

The best way to relieve stress is to exercise regularly.

You can also go cycling, swimming, or find any other activity instead of going to the gym. Furthermore, by staying active and exercising, you have the opportunity to vent and eliminate stress from your body.

Volunteer
Volunteering is a great way to get back on your feet after divorce. Doing charity work and helping others will make you feel good about yourself. Transform all the negativity in your life into positive actions, and bring happiness to others.

Work on your communication skills and insecurity
People who go through a divorce or a breakup usually have doubts when it comes to going into a new relationship. While you shouldn't rush into anything new too fast, it is crucial to work on your communication skills. If you think there is something you can improve about yourself and how you talk with others, do it.

A drawing of a husband and wife standing on divided cliffs and talking with megaphones.

Working on your communication skills is a good way to work on yourself.

Furthermore, it is also important to deal with insecurity issues if you have them. It is not easy to get back into the game if you were out of it for a long time. Be honest with yourself and address any issues you think you might have.

Find your happy place

To sum up, what we covered in this short but useful article, you should:

  • accept the reality and deal with it
  • take your time with the healing process
  • stay active and exercise
  • be positive
  • change your living location
  • work on yourself

If you follow these steps you will be able to get back on your feet after divorce and find your happy place. It won't be long, and everything will feel like a bad dream. Good luck!

Stephen Jones About the Author:
Stephen Jones is a motivational speaker, entrepreneur, and blogger. His vast experience is a source of knowledge for many people, and he enjoys talking about success and positive thinking. Stephen’s articles are useful for everyone looking to improve their confidence, build strong personal skills, and learn self-motivation.
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