Understanding Relationship Anxiety
and Simple Tips to Deal With It
By Reema Arora
Every relationship goes through turbulence at some point. It doesn't matter whether it’s a long-term relationship or a fresh romance, there will be trouble in your paradise at times. That can lead to anxiety in the relationship, which is pretty normal. But it all comes down to how you deal with it. How you cope can determine whether the relationship will survive and grow stronger, or end. Relationships require hard work and understanding each other. So when your relationship is going through a rough patch and there’s anxiety at play, your commitment to the relationship can help you carry on.
Here, we give a few tips on how to deal with that anxiety and keep going on.
Start Afresh, by Trusting Again:
One leading cause of relationship anxiety is lack of trust, which is the root cause of most problems. So identify what has led to this lack of trust, and then talk to your partner about it. Clear any misunderstandings and start over again. This may require you to start from scratch again to rebuild the relationship.
But if you love each other, then it will be worth every effort you put in. Take it slow for and in time trust will be restored, and there won’t be any place for anxiety.
Communicate More Often:
Anxiety arises when there is lack of communication. Do you share enough with your beloved? If you start noticing tension and resentment arise between you both, it means that there hasn’t been much communication. A healthy marriage can only last when there is open communication. Lack of it results in misunderstandings, frustration, arguments, and all that lead to anxiety. When there is no timely outlet for feelings, then you end up expressing it all in one nasty fight. One way to cope with this anxiety from misunderstandings is to start practicing mindful communication and be honest with your partner.
Don’t show your Anxiousness:
We all get anxious at times, about where our partner may be, who he is with and what is he doing. But acting out on your anxiousness can only hurt your partner. If you are always checking messages, calling every 5 minutes, still jealous, then you have relationship anxiety. We all have our insecurities, but pay no heed to it, because the more attention you pay to it, the weaker your trust can get.
This destructive behavior can weaken the relationship. Try to not act on your doubts and negative emotions and slowly they will stop bothering you as much. It will make your bond stronger, and you become more trusting.
Stop Comparing and measuring:
Not every relationship is the same. So there is no need to evaluate your partner’s love or to compare it. Your relationship can be filled with anxiety when you start to assess every move of your partner. Everyone shows love differently, and how they express might not be the same as you. Sometimes we all have a notion of an ideal relationship, and when things don’t go as per our expectations, we start getting anxious. Let your partner, express his affection in his own way. Accept that not everyone loves the same way and adjust your expectations accordingly. When you do, there is little strain in the relationship and on your partner.
Address the Lack of Equality:
Another primary cause of relationship anxiety is hierarchies in the relationship. A relationship comprises of two people, two opinions, and two minds – both equal. If one of you starts taking control of all the decision making, without consulting with the other, it can cause resentment. You need to give equal authority to your partner or demand authority if you don’t have it. There can only be a harmonious and joyous relationship, free from anxiety when there is equality in the relationship.
Don’t hold back:
If you aren’t all in it, then you have anxiety about the relationship. Don’t be too afraid to open up to your partner. Allow yourself to be loved and to love with all your heart. Don’t let your insecurities dictate the relationship. Accept each other just how you are and be vulnerable in the relationship. Relationships can only blossom when there is no hidden element. Exchange your needs, and motivate and help each other grow in the relationship, free from any negative emotions.
These are a few tips on how you can cope with relationship anxiety by recognizing what is causing it. Address anything that doesn’t feel right in the relationship, and be true to yourself. Controlling your relationship anxiety is not as difficult as it may seem. All the answers are out there; you need to remember that if someone makes you happy, you need to make an effort to make it work. And addressing anything that is causing anxiety and immediately fixes it. This way you can have a happy and satisfying relationship for a long time.
Reema Arora is a vivacious writer based in Hyderabad. She employs her expertise in various topics and uses writing as a platform to connect with her readers. Her articles focus on diverse subject matters ranging from relationship, parenting, health, and lifestyle. She is a regular contributor to MomJunction.com. Reema writes to encourage and motivate people to adopt healthy habits and live a stress-free lifestyle.