A Few Words of Encouragement for
Single Mothers Out There

By Amos Onwukwe

Words of encouragement, don't we all need them from time to time? Whether you're a student, teacher, lawyer, banker, clergy, sick or invalid, we all need words of encouragement to help us through our dark days.

In this short post I'll focus on single mothers and how they can overcome many of the challenges single mothers all around the world face daily.

Perhaps at this point you're wondering why single single mothers out?

Reports say about 1 in 3 American children is being raised by a single parent, and this under varying circumstances from bad to awful. These figures are much worse in other climes.

To every single mom out there I say:

1. You're Not Alone

Yes, you heard that right. I know it sounds strange, but yeah, you're not alone. He may have left you by death, divorce or denial, but you're not alone.

First, there are other single moms like you all across the world, who know exactly how it feels to be a single mother; the highs, the lows, the joys and pains.

Secondly, you have your kid(s). Raising a child or children as a couple is a tough job but somehow you've managed to survive and do it with a smile anyway. Let those little moments of laughter with your seeds light up your world.

Thirdly, you're loved. Maybe not by the one you loved and gave your heart and body to, but know that somehow, somewhere, someone truly loves you.

2. You're Beautiful

I know he probably said that to you, yet he left and left you wondering if the new girl was more beautiful, if you were ugly or …This is one of the 15 Things You Should Give Up to Be Happy. And, permit me to burst your bubble, but you're beautiful, more beautiful than you know.

Deep down you're a beautiful soul, you've managed to put all that behind you and forge on with your life. Look, you even got a job, learned a skill, volunteered, graduated college, etc.

You even go out of your way to help other people, including women who have been abandoned. Isn't that beautiful!

Go out girl, get your hair done, shop a few new clothes and treat yourself like the queen that you are, and while at it be open to love, never give up on true love. You can find it in the most unexpected places.

3. You're Amazing

You're simply amazing, okay, that was a lie. You're more than amazing, you're a superwoman. You single handedly raised the kids, changed their diapers, fixed their meals and kept the house squeaky clean.

On top of that you work two jobs, volunteer, work out, go to school, sing in the choir, run a freelance business and still manage to keep your head up.

Now that's ah-mazing, amazing with an ah in front. Most married couples aren't able to achieve even a quarter of what you've done or attempted alone, with the little you have.

Soon the kids will graduate high school, all thanks to you. What more can I say to you? You've done great, keep your head up and keep winning.

4. You Can Do It

Yes, you can. Like Nas said:

“I know I can be what I wanna be,
If I work hard at it, I'll be where I wanna be.”

Wanna graduate college, yes you can. Wanna start a business and succeed as an entrepreneur, yes you can. You may not have all the capital you want but you can start small, where you're at.

You can learn that skill, earn that degree, buy that house, anything. If you work harder at your dreams in spite of all you have to deal with as a single mom, you'll be successful.

The next time you're tempted to say I can't, just think of all you've accomplished as a single mother and say to yourself, “of course I can.”

5. It's Okay to Cry

Yes, it's okay to allow yourself feel vulnerable and enjoy the luxury of a few heartfelt tears. Trust me, not everyone can or will afford to let it out, but when you do you'll feel better afterward.

Sometimes memories of him may come calling reminding you of the morning he left and never looked back. Maybe you'll miss how such a nice, loving man he was until his life was cut short by cruel cops or criminals.

Whatever brings tears to your lovely eyes, feel free to let it flow in your privacy or before a trusted confidant. Just don't let it tie you down. You have an amazing life ahead of you, waiting to be lived to the fullest.

Not to mention that those lovely kids are also looking up to you to be there for them. Wipe your tears and give them the best you can afford while not neglecting your royal self. Someday those kids will be in a position to appreciate all you've done for them.

So, once again dear Single Mothers, remember:

• You're not alone
• You're beautiful
• You're amazing
• You can do it, and
• It's okay to cry sometimes